The month of
October, leading up to Halloween, has emphasis on ghosts and haunted houses. Indeed,
the telling of ghost stories is common as we approach October 31st.
I have a few
of my own ghost stories, of sorts. They involve the mystery that is my family.
I’ve shared
much about my dad’s abusive nature; that is familiar to me.
What,
however, is NOT as familiar, is knowing about him. Like many immigrant
families, the past was not discussed. I know very little about the exact country
my family came from. Likewise, I don’t know much about my dad, apart from his
rages and his obsession with farm work. The unknown reality, therefore, has left
me haunted, especially within the last few years. I now have the responsibility
of clearing my childhood home, a house in which my dad, his siblings and
parents all resided.
The house,
itself, is one hundred years old, filled with decades of memorabilia. And, in
organizing, clearing and cleaning the house, I have stumbled across some relics,
like his dog tags, which create more questions- and yes, ghosts.
So, it is
fitting that, earlier this month (again, the Halloween month of October), I
discovered a long lost photo album, devoted to my dad’s time in World War II.
Up until then, I only had a few photos of him; he was camera shy.
But, now I’ve
come across a brown leather photo album, with its black pages filled with photo
after photo of my young dad, in his early twenties. There were various shots of
him on his battleship, as well as many images of him hanging out with his fellow
army buddies. Now I have many photos of him. Still, there is no resolution to
the mystery of who is was.
Therefore,
this housecleaning has taken on a deeper meaning. As tedious and overwhelming
as the clearing of my childhood home is, there is significant value to the
process. No, I have not learned the answers to my ever expanding questions.
Yet, having these scattered puzzle pieces is something I’ve come to view as
buried treasure.
It has yet
to be determined what- and how much- I discover about him, about where I come
from. The haunted feeling could lead to despair, if it were not for the reality
God has every answer and is in the process of revealing, all in due time.
So, until
that time, I endeavor to remain thankful for what I do have, be it photos or
God’s perfect grace and mercy.
“And God is able to
make all grace abound toward you; that ye, always having all sufficiency in all
things, may abound to every good work.”
2 Corinthians 9:8
“Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that
we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need.”
Hebrews 4:16
“But none of these
things move me, neither count I my life dear unto myself, so that I might
finish my course with joy, and the ministry, which I have received of the Lord
Jesus, to testify the gospel of the grace of God.”
Acts 20:24
“Know ye that the LORD he is God…be thankful unto him…bless
his name. For the LORD is good; his mercy is everlasting; and his truth
endureth to all generations.”
Psalms 100:3-5
Yes, I’d
love to know ever answer, but Jesus’ words on knowing everything echo in my
mind…
“I have yet many
things to say unto you, but ye cannot bear them now.”
John 16:12
“Jesus answered and said unto him, ‘What I do thou knowest
not now; but thou shalt know hereafter.’”
John 13:7
What about
you? Can you relate?
It can be
tempting to believe we are the only ones going through a haunted, painful
experience. But many of us have unresolved questions and issues concerning our
loved ones. It’s far more prevalent than we think.
“…time and chance happeneth to them all.”
Ecclesiastes 9:11
There can be
some traumatic experiences, hushed secrets and missing puzzle pieces, driving
us from one painful, self-destructive choice to another.
Are you haunted? Or are you too aware of
something, desperately trying to forget
it?
Whatever the
case may be, God is keenly aware of its entirety. And He knows how to best deal
with the situation when it involves what is most precious to Him: us.
“Since you were precious in my sight… I have loved you…”
Isaiah 43:4
Perhaps,
concerning our finite selves, it is better we don’t know everything, absolutely
right now. God knows if it has the potential to destroy us.
Yes, I know,
“the
truth shall set us free (John 8:32). And that still stands.
However, it
doesn’t guarantee things will be painless. Far from it, often times.
I do want
answers. But am I ready for them? Well, that’s uncertain.
“For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when completeness comes, what is in part
disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child,
I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the
ways of childhood behind me. For now we see only a
reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part;
then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.”
1 Corinthians 13:9-12
What you and
I can do, however, is place faith in where we are now, as well as where God is
leading us. And He is leading us…
“Howbeit when he, the Spirit of truth, is come, he will guide
you into all truth: for he shall not speak of himself; but whatsoever he shall
hear, that shall he speak: and
he will shew you things to come.”
John 16:13
In the
meantime, we need to trust we are becoming who God has created us to be…
“But we all, with
unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being
transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as by the Spirit of the
Lord.”
2 Corinthians 3:18
No, it’s not
easy or pain-free. God never said it would be.
Nevertheless,
there is reward for staying connected to God, loving Him, in spite of our
flawed selves.
“But as it is written, ‘Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither
have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them
that love him.’”
1 Corinthians 2:9
God has, not
only every single answer, He also has help for every haunting we experience in
life.
So, right
now, wherever we are, however we’re haunted, let’s make the choice to go from
ghosts to God. And, with that, with God,
happy Halloween!
Copyright © 2015 by
Sheryle Cruse
