As a theatre
major in college, I once took a television performance class and was labeled
what “type” of look I had.
People made
comments like “exotic,” “a foreigner,” “a gypsy.” And then…
“She looks
like that woman from ‘Misery.’” (After waiting for what seemed like an eternity,
my professor finally, mercifully named
actress Kathy Bates).
And then, everyone chimed in with “yeah, she’s a
great crazy woman.”
Uh… thanks?
I had many
experiences with the type concept. In theatre, I was typecast in certain roles; most of them were crazy women. I was
the “character actor,” rather than the ingénue. That, however, still didn’t
stop my yearning to be a different type.
By college, I was introduced to William Shakespeare’s classic,
“Hamlet”- and, of course, the young, fragile-and crazy- Ophelia. I couldn’t get past the ingénue character’s
mystique. But let’s look a little closer at what the ingénue actually is.
“An unsophisticated girl or
young woman: a girl
or young woman who is naive and lacks experience or understanding of life”
“A
naive character in drama: a
character in a play or a movie who is a naive inexperienced young woman”
Really?
That’s what little girls want to be when we grow up? Hmmm… I
mention it because, for years, I associated that ingénue type with beauty. And,
since I linked beauty with extreme thinness, well, things went awry. Hopelessness,
despair and wrong views of God started the ball rolling. Physical and emotional
complications, like eating disorders, an irregular heartbeat and suicidal
thoughts were also some fun
highlights.
And yes, as my college’s production of “Hamlet” got
underway, I was also introduced to the Queen Gertrude character, Hamlet’s
mother. I was the understudy. Still, I yearned to play the blasted ingénue. I still wanted to be the beautiful damsel fairy
princess.
This wish continued to butt heads with my character actress
reality. Once, in a directing class, a fellow student was berated on how he
miscast his Lady Macbeth in an assigned scene. Then my instructor stated I should play the character; I could “play
mean.”
And another instance, when I asked this same instructor’s advice
on audition pieces, again, he mentioned Lady Macbeth. “You know you’ve already
set yourself up. You’re strong; you have a strong presence.”
Types and roles- they’re really the same thing, aren’t they?
And what do we do about them? Do we box ourselves in by their rigid standards,
believing only certain female characteristics are worthy? What types do we
covet- and disdain?
While researching an article on image, I came across a 1929 Marinello
ad.* It promoted different beauty types, touting its “Find Yourself” campaign,
complete with each female beauty type’s matching persona. Here are those descriptions…
The Cleopatra Type:
“Masculine hearts pound when she goes by.”
The Godiva Type: “Anglo-Saxon, blond, winsome and
how!”
The Sonja Type: “Dark and mysterious, she has a
way with her.”
The Cherie Type: “She brings the boulevards of
Paris to America.”
The Sheba Type: “Dark-brown hair and a queenly
air.”
The Lorelai Type: “Blond and aggressive, she
‘gets her man.’”
The Mona Lisa Type: “Light-brown hair and a
devastating smile.”
The Colleen Type: “She has more pep than a jazz
band.”
*(Ad featured in “Hope In a Jar: The Making of
America’s Beauty Culture,” by Kathy Peiss)
Yeah, I know.
And again, this beauty
type thing was not a foreign concept to me. After all, I participated in my own
“cute, pretty, beautiful” rating system as a child.
My mother and I set up
this assessment to judge other females. We’d pick a friend, a classmate, a
teacher or a celebrity and decide on her ranking. And, even though we didn’t know it, we were
also determining each female’s value as a human being.
Lovely.
This rating system also underscored my full-blown eating
disorder behaviors: anorexia, bulimia, binge- eating and, of course, constant
self-loathing.
It sprang from that
obsession I had with a certain type of beauty. Again, here comes the frail
ingénue worship.
“...They were now competition for me.
If I could be thinner than these women, then I’d be better than they were as
well… Competition grew between me and any thin girl or woman. Mirror, mirror: I
had to be the thinnest one of them all. It was life or death importance,
anything less than that was unacceptable. Gaining any weight, whatsoever, meant
failure, simple as that...What I didn’t realize at the time was that my eyes
and mind were incapable of seeing anything but a distorted image...”
(Excerpt from “Thin Enough: My
Spiritual Journey Through the Living Death Of An Eating Disorder”)
However, no matter what I
did, I could never perfectly attain that coveted standard. I never felt
“beautiful.” And so, what was I? Answer: an ugly failure.
Why
aren’t we enough?
Spiritually, it’s because we don’t see what God sees. We limit
ourselves. And we, as finite human beings, are more obsessed with the temporal,
distorted and often, harmful depictions of beauty rather than God’s eternal, spiritual truths.
Awareness is
key. First and foremost, what is God’s
beauty assessment of us?
I direct you
to the following passionate (yes, racy) - and far from ambivalent- scriptures; check out The Song of Solomon:
1:15: “Behold, thou art fair, my love; behold, thou art fair; thou hast doves'
eyes.”
2:14: “O my dove…let me see your form…for your form is lovely.”
4:1: “Behold, thou art fair, my love; behold, thou art fair; thou hast
doves' eyes...”
4:7: “Thou art all fair, my love; there is no spot in thee.”
6:4: “Thou art beautiful, O my love...”
7:10: “I am my beloved's, and his desire is toward me.”
Still, if we
only look to outward appearance, we’re selling ourselves short. Yes, each of us
has inherent beauty, but that is only part
of who we are. There’s so much more
to our intrinsic value than our faces and bodies, wonderful as they are.
Scripture,
in fact, states just how clueless we
can actually be about something as important as our worth.
“For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to
face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.”
1 Corinthians 13:12
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways my
ways, says the Lord. For as the
heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways, and My
thoughts than your thoughts.”
Isaiah 55:8-9
And external
image and inherent value issues? C’mon, we mess those things right up! We cannot wrap our minds
around Psalm 139:14:
“...I am fearfully and wonderfully made…”
Forget about the deeper things like love,
destiny, meaning and purpose!
“Since you were precious in my sight… I have loved you…”
Isaiah 43:4
“I have chosen you and have not cast you away.”
Isaiah 41:9
“The LORD hath appeared of old unto me, saying, ‘Yea, I
have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore with lovingkindness have I
drawn thee.’”
Jeremiah 31:3
“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the
Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.”
Jeremiah 29:11
(And, by the
way, these are all declarations from
God Himself here).
Notice there
was no mention of “type.” There was no asterisk, ingénue standard, no Godiva,
Sheba or Cherie categories in any of
those scriptures. There was just unconditional love, affirmative acceptance and
value, as is.
We’re
beautiful and valuable now- no diet,
manipulation, other person’s opinion or makeup required.
Therefore, we’d
all do well to typecast ourselves as incredible God-ordained creations right now!
Copyright © 2015 by
Sheryle Cruse
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