"Damsels- All of us out there- Arise!": Learning the Food Fight

Back in the 1970’s, the classic film, “Animal House” famously depicted John Belushi’s character starting a food fight in the college cafeteria.

Autumn’s back to school season strikes me with concern. Eating disorders are often triggered by the college experience. It’s littered with unhealthy food opportunities, everything from pizza delivery to vending machines; therefore, disordered eating opportunities can also abound. Life can become a food fight.

It certainly was my reality. As a child and a teenager who always struggled with her weight, I determined college to be my “reinvention.” If I could just be thin, I could be a new, better person.

Prepping for college, I engaged in a diet. However, I still was obsessed with food the entire time. There’s nothing like restriction to keep your attention on the forbidden object of desire, right?

But one thing I never bothered to deal with was my relationship with food.

“Is not life more than food?”

Jesus, in Matthew 6:25

And I did have a relationship, a quite dysfunctional one at that. Food was my comfort, my friend, my enemy, my reward and, as I became more mired in bulimia, my punishment. It took care of every need. However, that was not its job. It was meant to keep me alive and healthy. Period.

But my disordered thinking could not see that. Instead, I saw war.

“But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members.”

Romans 7:23

And war didn’t stop at food. It spread to conflicting messages; it was all or nothing, thin versus eating, being a “good girl” or a “bad girl.” Eventually I was engulfed in anorexia, at an unhealthy two digit weight, starving for days at a stretch. And that anorexic condition eventually morphed into bulimia when my ravenous state took control; I gained over one hundred pounds within nine months. Now, I experienced heart fluttering, shortness of breath and suicidal thoughts. I was miserable and out of control.

Eating disorders don’t happen overnight. Often, these behaviors have been years in the making. However, college, with the major lifestyle changes, stressors and pressuring expectations of young adulthood can lay groundwork for disordered eating to thrive. Whether it’s the need to compete in athletics, measure up to parental or peers’ expectations or cope with anxiety and massive changes, many young men and women see their chosen eating disorder as their “answer.” And so, they learn the techniques, sometimes even teaching them to fellow roommates, practice the disordered behaviors and, before long, come to discover they have gone further than they ever dreamed possible. Personal health, goals and life plans are all threatened.

And, most damaging of all is the spiritual impact. The eating disorders’ lies often do an insidious and thorough job of convincing the young person of the ultimate lie: God hates you and will not/cannot save you; therefore, it’s hopeless. That’s where I found myself.

And, it’s taken me years to spiritually relearn God’s Truth.

“I have chosen you and have not cast you away.”

Isaiah 41:9

“Behold, I am the Lord, the God of all flesh. Is there anything too hard for Me?”

Jeremiah 32:27

“The LORD hath appeared of old unto me, saying, ‘Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore with lovingkindness have I drawn thee.’”

Jeremiah 31:3

But how much pain could have been avoided if, upon going to college, I was aware of the spiritual, emotional and physical dangers resulting from the eating disorder path?

“My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge…”

Hosea 4:6

Knowledge.

This time of year, back to school emphasizes education. And, it’s at this time of year I encounter many frantic college-bound young people, with food, weight, image and self-esteem issues.

So, along with God’s Word, which never comes back without its intended purpose accomplished (Isaiah 55:11), I’ve provided some questions and eating disorder symptoms to look out for if you believe someone is struggling, or if you, yourself are affected.

Eating Disorder Signs:

Perfectionistic about appearance and achievement

Obsessed with image, food, dieting, counting calories, etc.

Excessive exercising (hours at a time)

Isolation from family and friends and secretive behavior (in example: exercising in the middle of the night, binge and purge sessions when alone, constant weighing of oneself)

Drastic weight loss, weight gain, fluctuations, (may also have a puffy face, scraped knuckles and hair loss)

Possession of laxatives, diet pills, diuretics and “thinspo” material

Stealing family members’, friends’ or roommates’ food and money

Self-critical, depressed and/or displaying erratic mood swings

Displaying cross addictive behavior: in example, alcohol/drug consumption, shopping, sexual activity, self-injury

Wearing excessively baggy clothes

Frequent trips to the bathroom, especially after eating

Frequent absences from classes, work or other activities

Questions To Ask… Do I having an eating disorder?

Do I expect to be perfect?