That beautiful black strapless gown with its
matching opera length gloves…
That red hair cascading over her shoulders…
That pin up figure, often known to decorate World
War II fighter planes…
What wasn’t to love about screen siren, Rita
Hayworth?
When I was twelve, she was one of my earliest beauty
icons.
And, of course, when I saw her stunning 1946 film,
“Gilda,” along with her “Put the Blame on Mame” song and dance routine, I was thoroughly convinced she was a woman reveling
confident in her beauty. No hint of insecurity for miles!
But, like any beauty icon, there was a more
complicated back story going on concerning her success and image...
Originally born Margarita Carmen Cansino, of
Spanish and Irish-English heritage, the starlet experienced two name changes in the
creation of her Hollywood identity. The first was as Rita Cansino and the
second later claimed her mother’s maiden name, Hayworth. It was about
emphasizing her mother’s Anglo ancestry. Indeed, studio head Harry Cohn, was so bothered by her Mediterranean-looking
appearance, he wanted to do all he could to convince audiences Rita was “classic
American,” via a less ethnic last name.
And, of course, physical appearance changes
were also in order for Rita’s Hollywood makeover. She not only colored her hair
from brunette to red, but also underwent electrolysis to raise her hairline.
So we see, even beauty Rita Hayworth was not
deemed acceptably beautiful until she
changed some things about herself.
And, after her career skyrocketed and
she became known as a movie star and a world famous beauty, things did not get easier.
We now see how fragile she was at accepting herself.
For, like that of legends, Marilyn Monroe,
Grace Kelly and Jayne Mansfield, poor Rita was mostly confined to the restrictions
associated with the beautiful woman. She was viewed as only that, never viewed beyond her attractive face and body.
And certainly, that hindered her personal
life; she couldn’t find the contentment she strongly desired. She was known for
discussing her less than glamorous struggle…
“All I wanted was just what everybody else wants, you know, to be loved.”
She sought that love, marrying and divorcing
five times; actor/director, Orson Welles was one of her famous husbands.
He specifically noted her struggles with alcohol
as all-consuming, a fact confirmed by that of Hayworth’s daughter, Yasmin Aga
Khan…
“...She had difficulty coping with the ups and downs of the business …
As a child, I thought, 'She has a drinking problem and she's an alcoholic'… It's
very difficult, seeing your mother, going through her emotional problems and
drinking and then behaving in that manner … Her condition became quite
bad...”
Her reality, indeed, expanded beyond her
glamorous beauty. And it is here, among Rita’s famous quotes, I’m especially struck
by the sad sentiment of this one…
“Rita Hayworth:
Portrait of a Love Goddess” (1977) by John Kobal
Image expectations, self-acceptance issues and
the longing to be loved are all shared human needs. Scripture taps into our
spiritual drive to be viewed and accepted on that basis…
“For he
knoweth our frame; he remembereth that we are dust.”
Psalms
103:14
“Since you
were precious in my sight… I have loved you…”
Isaiah 43:4
“The LORD hath appeared of old unto me,
saying, ‘Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore with
lovingkindness have I drawn thee.’”
Jeremiah
31:3
Rita was no different. Beyond the film noir
of “Gilda,” beyond the glossy black and white Hollywood photographs, there was
another person- a separate person- apart from the beauty displayed before our
transfixed attention.
For her legacy is not only “Gilda” and her beauty,
but rather, the real, struggle-filled life she led. Besides her struggles with alcohol, in 1987,
at the age of 68, she also succumbed to complications from Alzheimer’s disease.
She wasn’t a one-dimensional movie star; she was a
human being, susceptible to the human experience.
Just like the rest of us…
Once upon a time, I only saw Rita’s beauty and
glamour. I didn’t see her complicated actual life. None of us did. Perhaps, we
still don’t as we admire her photographs and films years later.
But, if we get past the surface, we can experience
more of Rita: the good, the bad and the ugly. We can learn of her human
struggle.
And that can be said concerning each one of us. No
matter what our battles are- to be loved, to be valued, to be safe, to be sober,
to be healthy- each of us cannot live fulfilled if we go sleep as a lie, and
wake up a fictional, untrue character. We cannot live removed from the truth of
who we are.
Perhaps, the “real us” is disappointing, not just to
others, but to our own self-acceptance. Be honest. Are you disappointed when
you wake up with who you really are, warts and all?
“For as he
thinketh in his heart, so is he...”
Proverbs
23:7
Or, do we incorporate the tedious, painful and
imperfect process of learning and accepting that person? That is as much of the
process to life and recovery as attending any meeting or implementing any step.
So, Rita Hayworth touches upon a spiritual question
for us all:
“Do
you and I live as Gilda or Rita?”
Whatever the answer may be, let’s choose to
recognize our real identity, in
harmony with God’s estimation of us, which is a freeing experience.
“The truth shall set you free.”
John 8:32
For as alluring as the Gilda character may be, she
pales in comparison to the textured, flawed, meaningful and real Rita.
Shouldn’t we dare to live the more dimensionally
accurate reality of ourselves?
And so it goes. Gilda or Rita: it’s our choice.
Copyright © 2017 by Sheryle Cruse
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