The H.A.L.T. Stop Sign
I practice an effective recovery tool: “H.A.L.T.”
Its simple wisdom
deals our response toward addiction, compulsion and disorder:
“Don’t let yourself become too Hungry,
Angry, Lonely or Tired.”
There are
positive results there, just in the physical realm alone.
But, if we go
deeper, we also see the spiritual relevance behind that acronym. It addresses our
tricky heart condition.
“For what I am doing, I do not understand...”
Romans 7:15
H.A.L.T.
counsels, “Stop” when our addictive nature screams, “Go full speed ahead!”
Pausing to
spell the letters- and heed the advice- can give us the time to process what,
exactly, is threatening to run amuck in our lives.
First, There is Hungry...
Why we use-
anything- goes beyond the life sustenance element. It is not about being physically
famished.
Rather,
there are unexpressed, unmet needs: spiritual, emotional and mental. These punishing
drives make their demands.
“Don’t let yourself
become too hungry...”
Hunger #1: Meaning:
Ecclesiastes notes the challenges rising against personal
meaning, mainly, from that of life itself.
“I have seen all the
works that are done under the sun; and, behold, all is vanity and vexation of spirit.”
Ecclesiastes 1:14
“So I hated life, for the work which had been done under the
sun was grievous to me; because everything is futility and striving after
wind.”
Ecclesiastes 2:17
Yeah, it can
be quite difficult to find a point- to anything. Forget about one’s personal
significance!
Scripture,
however, thankfully, does not stop with those musings. Our Divine Creator has
had other ideas about our value.
“For my thoughts are
not your thoughts, nor are your ways my ways, says the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My
ways higher than your ways, and My thoughts than your thoughts.”
Isaiah 55:8-9
We are
intrinsically valuable; and the times we need to remember that the most are in
those temptation moments.
But we’re
not done with the gnawing Hunger yet.
Hunger #2: Entertainment:
Here is
where we confront boredom and our wish to be appeased with pleasure.
“Ye have lived in pleasure on the earth, and
been wanton...”
James 5:5
This hunger
falls right into addiction’s mindset. And it got its start early.
“And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was
pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of
the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he
did eat.”
Genesis 3:6
The classic
over-promise of a pleasure dangles before our minds, already filled with unmet
needs and a sense of denied longings. The “tempting apple,” therefore,
reassures us we will be fulfilled and freed from all of life’s unpleasant
circumstances if we partake of it.
Yet, here is
the reality...
“For what pleasure
hath he in his house after him, when the number of his months is cut off in the
midst?”
Job 21:21
Destruction,
in addiction’s pursuit, inevitably, comes to us.
We are
hungry for the Divine; it’s hard-wired into each of us.
However, we often
choose to superimpose our chosen addiction resource where the true Source
should be. We all do it.
If we’re
honest with ourselves, we’d rather have the instantaneous option instead of the
delayed gratification, character-building and lifestyle- changing challenge of
the Most High’s influence in our lives.
Yet, the
lasting, rewarding, life-affirming/sustaining benefits come from only one
direction: the Divine.
“Thou wilt show me the
path of life: in thy presence is fullness of joy; at thy right hand there are
pleasures for evermore.”
Psalms 16:11
We need to
recognize pleasure- seeking is distraction- seeking. And this prevents and/or
destroys health, healing and well-being.
Hunger #3: Love:
And of
course, we’d be remiss if we did not look at, perhaps, the most powerful kind
of hunger, a desire for love.
“I have chosen you and have not cast you away.”
Isaiah 41:9
"Since thou is precious in my sight... I have loved thee..."
Isaiah 43:4
Isaiah 43:4
How many of
us crave to hear, feel and experience those scriptures?
How many of
us, sadly, are left wanting?
"When my father and my mother forsake me..."
Psalm 27:10
Psalm 27:10
Here’s where
we tap into the unmet need/conditional love/abuse reality too many of us,
unfortunately, have survived.
We cannot
deny it; we are hungry for safe, nurturing verbal, physical and mental
expressions of an unconditional love which never disqualify our value,
importance and loveable natures.
But life is
not ideal. It’s flawed, pain-filled and rife with soul-testing situations.
And those
situations can reinforce identity lies and value theories. You probably recognize
some of them in your own life.
“You’re a mistake!”
“I wish you were never born!”
“You’re stupid!”
“You’ll never amount to anything!”
“I never wanted you in the first
place!”
“I don’t love you!”
Any of these
examples are excruciating enough to hear.
But,
unfortunately, their pain often also translates into an equal difficulty for us
to hear or accept anything contrary to
those statements.
And that
includes the unconditional love decrees of the Divine.
“The LORD hath appeared of old unto me,
saying, ‘Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore with
lovingkindness have I drawn thee.’”
Jeremiah
31:3
"...‘I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.’"
Hebrews 13:5
Hebrews 13:5
If we do not
or cannot know or accept those Truths for ourselves, we then reach for a
version of our own accepting, loving substitute to comfort us. Here come the
addictions and disorders which promise to nurture, protect, free and deliver us
from all demons and ghosts.
But, again,
they are imperfect, failing substitutes. They do not satisfy hunger and they do
not love us. There is only One Who can do that.
“For he satisfieth the longing soul, and
filleth the hungry soul with goodness.”
Psalms 107:9
So, the
hunger element vies for our attention. That, in and of itself, is enough to
contend with.
But we are far
from done here. We still have more spelling of H.A.L.T. to do.
Angry:
“Then said the LORD, ‘Doest thou well to be angry?’”
John 4:4
Anger is a
human emotion. Nothing can cancel that reality.
Unfortunately,
we have believed a harmful lie; it is a sin to be angry.
Scripture,
however, addresses anger, quite directly...
“Be ye angry, and sin
not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath.”
Ephesians 4:26
Ephesians acknowledges we have anger. Yet, it
doesn’t just leave us unattended there, with
that anger.
Rather, it cautions us with a useful reality
check:
Don’t
wreck things (sin) by stewing in it.
We all know
the cliché marital advice, “Don’t go to bed angry.” It’s adorable. The cute couple
having the cute lovebird spat.
Yet there is
wisdom there, should we choose to embrace it.
“He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he
that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city.”
Proverbs 16:32
Anger’s
presence does not denote we are evil creatures. Again, human beings will be
angry. But what we do in/with that
anger is another matter.
This taps
into our addictive natures, our expression and/or repression of our experiences
and behaviors. And it begs the question...
“...‘Doest thou well to be angry?’”
John 4:4
So, just
what is this thing, called our anger,
anyway?
One
definition states it is a combination of three components: fear, hurt and
frustration.
Therefore, when we say “I’m angry,” these
three expressions are its prominent evidence.
“Don’t let yourself
become too angry...”
Anger #1: Fear:
This element
seems to be the most primal. Its existence stems from self-preservation.
Fear, at its
most basic, keeps us alive.
It is here
where we approach adrenaline, our “fight or flight” responses. And it is here
where things can become more complex and even harmful.
“Fear and a snare is come upon us, desolation and
destruction.”
Lamentations 3:47
For, in many
of our backgrounds, there have been overtaxed adrenal glands, rapid firing
“fight or flight.” This is in response to stressful circumstances, depleted our
coping resources with an equally depleting message, blaring, “Danger! Unsafe!”
The message can be to such things as poverty, abuse, abandonment or any other
trauma. These reactions can be considered to be “snares.”
And if/when
all we hear and absorb is “danger,” eventually we will learn to fear.
"Will
the Lord cast off forever? And will he be favorable no more?"
Psalm 77:7
Psalm 77:7
Anxiety,
therefore, places us in a state in which we will do anything to avoid or escape
that perceived danger.
“Therefore snares are round about thee, and sudden fear
troubleth thee.”
Job 22:10
And yes,
scripture responds with reassurances; repeatedly, we are told not to fear.
“Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage;
be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the LORD thy God is with thee whithersoever thou
goest.”
Joshua 1:9
“...‘Be not afraid, only believe.’”
Mark
5:36
“...‘Fear not: believe only...’”.
Luke
8:50
We are
encouraged to believe the Most High, at His Word...
“What time I am afraid,
I will trust in thee.”
Psalms 56:3
However, you
and I know this is easier said than done.
For, at
least in the short term, it is more accessible to rely on our addiction,
disorder or compulsion. These things are already there for us to see, grab and
use.
Trusting in
a “Higher Power,” however, is the much more difficult work of faith, on
believing that which is not three-dimensionally experienced, here and now.
“Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence
of things not seen.”
Hebrews 11:1
Therefore,
because of this challenge, uneasily mixed with our anxieties and our longings
for immediate relief, we respond in an angry mode. We are afraid and want to
self-protect from encroaching danger.
Sometimes, we
lash out using our addictions.
Anger #2: Hurt
This behavior
can further spill into the hurt aspect of anger.
"When my father and my mother forsake me..."
Psalm 27:10
Psalm 27:10
“A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up
anger.”
Proverbs 15:1
Indeed, hurt,
rejection and grievous words all emanate from a particular place found within
our wounds.
“The spirit of a man will sustain his infirmity; but a
wounded spirit who can bear?”
Proverbs 18:14
The initial
occurrence of wounding can take minutes or even seconds to happen. Yet, the
ramifications exist for much longer.
Now there is
the aftermath; now there is the painful coping process, which attempts to forget,
heal, undo and repair.
“Why is my pain perpetual, and my
wound incurable, which refuseth to be healed?...”
Jeremiah 15:18
And, most
often, that process is further met
with obstacles, additional hurt, discouragement and hopelessness.
"Will
the Lord cast off forever? And will he be favorable no more?"
Psalm 77:7
Psalm 77:7
It is here where
we are drawn to anything which claims to “kill the pain.”
We are
miserable. And, it’s not too long before we leap from this personal misery place
to a desire/decision to become obliterated in any sense of the word, often, via our addictions. This is the human
responses as we try, in vain, to answer our “why questions.”
Why did this happen to me?
Why was I abused?
Why was I left alone?
Operating from
the legitimate place of righteous anger, having been violated in our lives, we
are angry. Therefore, we often determine to seek vengeance and change the
circumstances until they make sense.
However,
most of the time, when we do that, we rarely experience the satisfying result
we desire.
That is
largely because we were never designed to fulfill that role.
“Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves… for it
is written, ‘Vengeance is mine; I will repay, ‘saith the Lord. Therefore if thine enemy hunger,
feed him; if he thirst, give him drink: for in so doing thou shalt heap coals
of fire on his head. Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.”
Romans 12:19-21
That
directive feels far from satisfying. But the unflinching Truth is we don’t know
why things happen. Still, there is a larger purpose and, despite our human
experiences, a lasting importance to each of us.
And,
although it may not instantly “cure” every hurt we go through, there is help
from our Creator; there is love.
If we look
at Psalm 27:10 more closely, we can see the Divine response
to a human action/failing which touches us. It goes beyond our parents.
"When my father and my mother forsake me..."
We can also insert anyone or anything else which abandons us.
Indeed, when we are hurt by anyone or anything, the supernatural reaction
is in effect...
"... then the LORD will take me up."
Psalm 27:10
Psalm 27:10
It is the reliable response from the reliable Source.
“He sent his word, and healed them, and
delivered them from their destructions.”
Psalms 107:20
By practicing the “A” of “H.A.L.T.,” we, perhaps, can give ourselves that
opportunity.
Regardless, we are still not finished spelling the “A” in “Angry.”
Anger #3: Frustration:
I’ve heard
the definition of anger is a blocked wish.
"Will
the Lord cast off forever? And will he be favorable no more?"
Psalm 77:7
Psalm 77:7
And yes,
here is the domain of frustration...
“For we are consumed by thine anger, and by thy wrath are we
troubled.”
Psalm 90:7
It is quite
a challenge to determine where one anger element begins and another ends. They bleed
into one another.
And with
Frustration, this is especially in effect. This is the reaction to a perceived
blocked wish.
The blocked wish of feeling loved, safe,
secure and protected...
The blocked wish of feeling free from
inflicted pain, of feeling unsaddled with another’s harmful baggage...
The blocked wish of feeling
incapable, strained and desperate as one attempts to cope with the encumbered
life experience which includes generational realities of addiction, dysfunction
and abuse...
So, with the
buildup of all of these situations, it is inevitable there will be a breaking point.
Full-blown addiction can be just one manifestation to this “blocked wish.”
Nevertheless,
we need to acknowledge and deal with this reality in as healthy a manner as
possible.
And again, Divine
Providence has provided cautionary wisdom to guide our human responses...
“Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to
hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath.”
James 1:19
I know. This
is so much easier said than practiced, than lived. But, nevertheless, it is
possible.
Scripture
points to the “fruit of the spirit” to inform us we have been equipped for such
moments...
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace,
longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, Meekness, temperance: against such
there is no law.”
Galatians 5:22-23
We have the
capability to stop and not express anger in its most explosive state. H.A.L.T.
can be a useful tool.
“Don’t let yourself
become too angry...”
And the
strong subtext in that statement is ‘Don’t lash out on others- or yourself- via
self-destructive behavior.’ You and I can make another choice in that moment,
even when it’s an angry moment.
And yes,
that also applies to a lonely moment as well.
“Lonely:”
Indeed, the “L”
letter of H.A.L.T. touches on our despair.
“...‘The LORD hath forsaken me, and my Lord hath forgotten
me.’”
Isaiah 49:14
We want to
escape the feeling of being forsaken and hopeless.
How many
benders and binges are done isolated, refusing interaction with any person or
outside help?
Loneliness is
never far from us. And it comes with its negative consequences.
“...Social
isolation impairs
immune function and boosts inflammation, which can
lead to arthritis, type II diabetes, and heart
disease. Loneliness is breaking our hearts, but as a
culture we rarely talk about it.
Loneliness
has doubled: 40 percent of adults in two
recent surveys said they were lonely, up from 20 percent in the 1980s...”
“Loneliness Is Deadly,” By Jessica Olien
Sooner or
later, in a moment of crisis, we face the “Lonely” of H.A.L.T.
We are in the
valley of decision now.
Do we turn to- or away from- that
soothing, attractive and dependable addiction?
Do we refuse any and all other
healthier options like attending a meeting or calling someone for help?
Or, do we “white knuckle” until our
only recourse is to find comfort in the very thing we know is
bad/dangerous/unhealthy for us?
Sometimes,
we do buckle under the pressure.
We
self-medicate; we try to soothe ourselves. We want companionship and
obliteration via our addiction. Through its use, we want to escape and forget
our misery, our perception of utter aloneness.
But, the H.A.L.T.
option is there regardless. And, that coupled with a spiritual focus can help
us to be mindful and remember there is, in fact, hope.
First and
foremost, someone has already been there, done that.
Even Our
Savior felt the abandoned, temptation-fraught, circumstances, feeling left only
to worst possible outcomes...
“...‘Eli, Eli, lama
sabachthani? that is to say, My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?’”
Matthew 27:46; Mark 15:34
Yet, if we
stay with the entirety of the account, we find the forsaken “fact” was not the
final Word. Divine Promise has reassured us of His constant Presence, even
spiting feelings and circumstances.
“... the LORD thy God, he it is that doth go with thee; he
will not fail thee, nor forsake thee.”
Deuteronomy 31:6
Loneliness,
indeed, offers a temptation opportunity in life, presenting our addiction as
the sole remedy. So, do we reach out for outside help or shut down, choosing to
be alone with our vice?
“H.A.L.T.”
offers us a mindful pause to gather ourselves.
“I will instruct you
and teach you in the way you should go: I will guide you with My eye.”
Psalm 32:8
Before we rush
headlong into a destructive option, we can even stop, remember and incorporate
the Divine in our spiritual hope...
“... ‘I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.’”
Hebrews 13:5
Our personal
lonely moments, therefore, can become a spiritual experience of growth, help
and community.
“Don’t let yourself
become too lonely...”
The
“H.A.L.T.” ball is in our court.
And yes,
inevitably, our vulnerability smacks right into another human reality: we get tired.
Hence, the
“T” of “H.A.L.T.” shows up...
Tired:
Whether you
want to call it exhausted, spent or weary, it still produces the same result: we
hit our limit.
“…Some researchers suggest that
sleep deprivation should be recognized with the same seriousness that has been
associated with the societal impact of alcohol.”
“Sleep Habits:
More Important Than You Think,” By Michael J. Breus, PhD
It’s that particular
information which caught my attention concerning addiction.
Often, we don’t
connect the dots between sleep deprivation and our recovery experiences. Lack
of sleep makes everything more difficult and fraught with negative outcomes.
Much like
“H.AL.T.’s” Lonely “L,” when we are taxed emotionally, mentally and physically,
we expose ourselves, even more, to our addictive natures. We are depleted,
unable to access the necessary reserves/resources we usually tap into for
healthy recovery purposes.
Sleep,
refreshed mental, emotional and physical faculties all support the will and the
ability to stay with our program.
Exhaustion, however, often beckons us to
choose the self-destructive “path of least resistance.”
In this state, our addiction appears mirage-perfect and all- soothing.
Yet, this still doesn’t change the reality of sleep
deprivation’s harmful effects on us.
Indeed, the health
risks, according to Breus’ article, include such negative results as high
blood pressure, heart failure, stroke and what is officially listed
as “poor quality of life.”
Yes, “being tired” makes healthy choice implementation more
difficult and unsuccessful.
With our defenses down, we see no other recourse than to
indulge.
We want relief, any
relief.
“Don’t let yourself
become too tired.”
Spiritually, the H.A.L.T. reminder, should we choose to heed it,
reassures us there is Divine assistance offered to us.
“Have you not
known? Have you not heard? The
LORD is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary;
his understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the faint,
and to him who has no might he increases strength...”
the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary;
his understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the faint,
and to him who has no might he increases strength...”
Isaiah 40:28-29
Really? Just somehow, magically, we are going to be comforted,
helped AND rested?
Romans 8:28, another well- worn scripture, likewise, feels too
idealistic to be relevant...
“And we know that all things work
together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according
to his purpose.”
Yet, look at the scriptures
following up to that “everything’s gonna turn out okay” sentiment...
“Likewise the Spirit also helpeth our infirmities: for we know
not what we should pray for as we ought: but the Spirit itself maketh
intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered. And he that
searcheth the hearts knoweth what is
the mind of the Spirit, because he maketh intercession for the saints according
to the will of God.”
Romans 8:26-27
We see how flawed
circumstances and our personal frailty, including our addictions, all dovetail
into a spiritual, human and relevant truth: the Most High knows us.
He knows us because He
created us.
He knows us because He
never stopped loving us.
Therefore, He has made it
top priority to know exactly when we
reach our limits. He knows this information long
before we do.
“Declaring the end from the
beginning, and from ancient times the
things that are not yet
done, saying, My counsel shall stand, and I will do all my pleasure.”
Isaiah 46:10
And He has a “love-grace-even escape- action plan” for just such
a thing called life. Yours and mine.
“For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of
yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast.”
Ephesians 2:8-9
"No temptation has seized you
except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be
tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also
provide a way out so that you can stand up under it."
1 Corinthians 10:13
1 Corinthians 10:13
And when we blow right
through that?
“My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made
perfect in weakness.”
2 Corinthians 12:9
“...where sin abounded, grace did
much more abound.”
Romans 5:20
And, come on, how many
times have you and I “blown it” because we were exhausted?
Yes, grace is mindboggling
and wonderful.
Yet in an imperfect human context,
if we also have the tools to increase
blessing and decrease destruction, wouldn’t we benefit from implementing those
tools?
“Don’t let yourself
become too tired.”
“Being tired,” indeed, is a caution we are more
vulnerable to harmful circumstances, including our addictions. Therefore, by
heeding the H.A.L.T. signal, we, perhaps, maximize the positive and minimize
the negative.
Plus, awareness of our
human limitations, once again, reminds us of the grace/imperfect us reality. We
are not running the show. We have been granted grace, mercy, allowances and
help.
But, in and of ourselves?
We are as helpless as a that of a baby bird.
Or, as the first step
acknowledges...
“We admitted we were powerless over our
addiction - that our lives had become unmanageable.”
H.A.L.T. is not the
end-all, be-all life solution. But it is a helpful, spiritually infused tool if
we employ it as such. It works well when it is in conjunction with a full
program: spirituality, human support, personal accountability and honest
assessments of who and where we are in life.
H.A.L.T. can be a life-affirming,
life-changing Stop sign.
But, ultimately, we choose
whether or not we stop for it.
Copyright © 2018 by
Sheryle Cruse
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