Miss America

When I was a little girl, I remember getting this Miss America doll from a cereal book offer (I think it was Corn Flakes).

I loved playing with her. She was beautiful, with her long eyelashes, which weren’t just painted on; they actually stuck out.

She was dressed in a beautiful gown, red robe, Miss America sash, sparkly crown and carried a bouquet of red roses and a scepter.

She was the epitome of beauty, femininity and everything a female was “supposed” to be. As a little girl, besides wanting to be a princess and a movie star, for a time, yes, I also wanted to be Miss America. A lot of little girls do. And, throughout the years, there’s been controversy around the contest, image and aspirational importance. Criticism for the swimsuit category, unrealistic body images, pitting women against one another and the sheer focus on beauty as value for the female gender have all come into play. And the controversy is deserved, I suppose. One thing about that doll I failed to see then but think about now was the movement of her limbs. In order to “mimic” the congratulatory walk of the newly crowned Miss America down that famous runway, the doll’s arms and legs only went straight. Left arm forward triggered the right leg forward and vice versa. And, oh, yeah, her head swiveled, side to side, apparently taking in the crowd cheering her on. So, yes, that’s a completely healthy and realistic standard to teach a little girl, right? Beauty. We cannot deny its importance. The diet and cosmetic industries focus on it heavily. And horrible body image and eating disorders are just a sampling of the negative results from that emphasis. I know with my eating disorder track record, I operated from a Machiavelli “the ends justify the means.” And those “ends” were extreme thinness and perfection, also known as the desired beauty. So, I obsessed about it, pursuing it with single minded purpose. I thought losing weight, being thin, striving for attractiveness were all worthwhile. It seemed like it, especially as I received positive feedback from others about how pretty I was. That attention made me feel like I had achieved my own Miss America moment. That was it; I had finally achieved my value. But my focus was wrong, right from the start. For the attained beauty or rather, the illusion of attained beauty, was a hard taskmaster, an ever moving target, requiring I grow more desperate and extreme to achieve and maintain it. In its pursuit, I swung the full gamut: anorexia, bulimia, and binge overeating were the most obvious effects of its pursuit. But the damage went further; it affected me spiritually. “There is a way which seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death.” Proverbs 14:12 I believed the lie. I had reached the point of no return as far as God was concerned. I was not only a horrible, unattractive failure; I was also a hopeless, unloved creature God wanted nothing whatsoever to do with. “There she is…Miss America…” It’s not so bright and shiny, full of promise in that light, is it? It’s because my entire being was like that Miss America doll, only going, with rigid, tunnel vision, one way to self-destruction. How, then, could I ever expect to experience life, happiness or beauty? God has called us beautiful already. Scriptures confirm God’s view of us: “O my dove…let me see your form…for your form is lovely.” Song of Solomon 2:14 “Thou art all fair, my love; there is no spot in thee.” Song of Solomon 4:7 “Thou art beautiful, O my love…” Song of Solomon 6:4 God wants us to see ourselves positively. However, we are not to stop at beauty; we are so much more. “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.” Proverbs 31:30 There are gifts, talents and characteristics we haven’t tapped into yet. But if we are only focused on beauty as being the end all, be all, how can we ever hope to discover and experience them? God wants us to uncover our full selves, not just our beauty. We are created to be more than a Miss America beauty pageant title. Proverbs 31 speaks of the virtuous woman. Beauty’s an element of that virtue, but check out what else God has created us to be (verses 10-31): “A woman of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands. She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from afar. She gets up while it is still night; she provides food for her family and portions for her female servants. She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard. She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks. She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night. In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers. She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy. When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet. She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothed in fine linen and purple. Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land. She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies the merchants with sashes. She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: ‘Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.’ Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.” That’s already you, now! Explore, experience and live it! It’s far more rewarding than any pageant could ever be! Copyright © 2013 by Sheryle Cruse