As a
recovering eating disorder sufferer, I’m keenly aware of the perfectionistic
component to the creation, maintenance and challenging treatment of the
disease. It’s often an uphill battle. Perfectionism, fueled by deep anxiety and
pressure, can kill. According to statistics...
·
Eating
disorders have the highest mortality rate of any mental illness
·
A study
by the National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders
reported that 5 – 10% of anorexics die within 10 years after contracting the
disease; 18-20% of anorexics will be dead after 20 years and only 30 – 40% ever
fully recover
·
The
mortality rate associated with anorexia nervosa is 12 times higher than the
death rate of ALL causes of death for females 15 – 24 years old.
·
20% of
people suffering from anorexia will prematurely die from complications related
to their eating disorder, including suicide and heart problems
(From South Carolina Department
of Mental Health:
So, the word
“perfect” is not just a word; it can be a threat.
The
perfectionistic person, in recovery or not, is therefore, left to grapple with its
meaning for his/her life. How important is it?
According to
the dictionary definition, it reads as follows:
“Being
entirely without fault or defect: flawless; satisfying all
requirements; corresponding to an ideal standard”
So, of
course, with that definition, it’s
all too easy for a perfectionistic eating disorder sufferer to take it to its
extreme limits. I did.
What are we
to do then, if the definition of the word and its presence both seem to be so
epidemic, harmful and hopeless?
What if we
changed the view of the word?
Being a
Christian, doing my “faith walk,” I’ve had to examine not just what I believe about
the word, “perfect.” I’ve also needed to look at what God believes about it as well.
And the word
IS in the Bible.
After all,
God is described as perfect.
“As for God, his way is perfect...”
2 Samuel 22:31; Psalms 18:31
And most of
us can acknowledge that fact. A perfect God isn’t so much of a problem to us as
an imperfect humanity. That’s us. And that’s where things go awry.
I’ve often
prayed about and pondered the “perfect” word in the Christian context. I’ve
wondered what, exactly, is required
of us. Perfect is there, applying to us.
“That the man of God may be perfect,
throughly furnished unto all good works.”
2 Timothy 3:17
“Thou shalt be perfect with the LORD
thy God.”
Deuteronomy 18:13
“I in them, and thou in me, that they
may be made perfect in one; and that the world may know that thou hast sent me,
and hast loved them, as thou hast loved me.”
John 17:23
Looking at
the mention of the word, it can appear bleak. It looks downright impossible. But
are we viewing the word correctly?
And,
perhaps, here’s where a shift in thinking- or, rather, defining the word
“perfect” comes in. And that word is “effective.” Does that work? Now, let’s
take a gander at the scriptures.
“That the man of God may be effective,
throughly furnished unto all good works.”
2 Timothy 3:17
“Thou shalt be effective
with the LORD thy God.”
Deuteronomy 18:13
“I in them, and thou in me, that they
may be made effective in one; and that the world may know
that thou hast sent me, and hast loved them, as thou hast loved me.”
John 17:23
Indeed, God
knows we fall short of His perfect glory (Romans 3:23). But, nevertheless, He has desired
for us to use what He’s given us: “power, love and a sound mind” (2 Timothy 1:7). Wouldn’t that mean we’d need to be effective? Again, let’s check out
the dictionary definition of the word:
“Producing
a strong impression or response; Prepared for use or action; Operative”
So, are we effective
in our recovery, our life and our faith?
It is not a onetime event; it’s ongoing. It is a process, an
imperfect one, requiring patience.
“But let patience have her perfect work, that
ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing.”
James 1:4
And that’s often
discouraging. But I think we need to be more imperfect process minded than
perfection minded. And none of us
have arrived. As long as we’re in this life thing, there will be pressing and
reaching; there will be some form of recovery process.
“Not as though I had already
attained, either were already perfect: but I follow after, if that I may
apprehend that for which also I am apprehended of Christ Jesus.”
Philippians 3:12
And perfection only will occur when we’re
completely reconciled, spirit, mind and body, back to God.
“Till we all come in the unity of the
faith, and of the knowledge of the Son of God, unto a perfect man, unto the
measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ:”
Ephesians 4:13
So, in the meantime, there’s grace.
“And he said unto me, My grace is
sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly
therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may
rest upon me.”
2 Corinthians 12:9
Grace exists in spite of our inherent
imperfection. Grace empowers us with effectiveness. It is not oppressive; it’s
freeing.
The same, however, cannot be said of
perfectionism.
There’s a lot to recover from; there’s a lot
to change, heal and correct. Those of us, grappling with addictions, disorders
and compulsions will not be helped by rigid and unrealistic standards.
“For as he thinketh in his heart, so
is he...”
Proverbs 23:7
We will, however, be helped by God…
“I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go:
I will guide you with My eye.”
Psalm 32:8
So, as we go through life, let’s think in
terms of being effective, not perfect. God is both; He has it covered!
That’s worth thinking and living!
Copyright © 2016 by
Sheryle Cruse
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