My Fairytale Axe To Grind

I once came across some black and white stills for Disney’s animated film, “Sleeping Beauty.” The film studio’s artists drew the female model, dressed as our fairytale heroine, Aurora, as she flitted and spun around. From those drawings, we have the blonde princess we’ve come to know today.

And yes, there was the resemblance between human model and animated ingénue. But, what was, perhaps, more startling and disturbing was what was lost in translation: reality.

I understand that fairytales are for the purpose of escape, imagination and even, in some cases, cautionary tale telling. But it is, indeed, from that last point where I suppose I have my fairytale axe to grind. For, all of the focus on youth, beauty and “happily ever after,” where, oh where, is the actual preparation for real life when it comes to our real world females?

I can hear some voices out there saying, “Lighten up.” I understand that. These voices insist that it’s all harmless. It’s from the perspective of childhood innocence and fun. And yes, there is a place for that.

But now, we live in an even more unforgiving and demanding world. Therefore, let’s face it- the fairytale answer is not to be relied on. And, as I viewed the final product of this artist’s renderings, come on, let’s look at the actual preparation message being sent to our girls:

“After all, I am 16.”

Since when did age sixteen determine the apex of all maturity and wisdom? Disney princesses are notoriously known for being that magic age. “Sweet Sixteen” is when everything suddenly, perfectly and gloriously blooms for every single female who even walked the earth.

Disappointment in five, four, three…

It shouldn’t come as a surprise that, so many years after “Sleeping Beauty” was released into the movie theaters, youth is still exalted. Aurora was not focused on college, on becoming a fully formed, intelligent human being. Nope. The next statement from her is more like it…

“It’s my dream prince.”

Easy, fellow feminists, easy. I know. It’s maddening.

And again, it reflects what is important and aspirational when it comes to training the female psyche. Think I’m exaggerating? Check out the bridal industry.

 It’s no wonder we have a sci-fi horror film scene of “Bridezillas” on our hands. Everything targeted at our beautiful bride du jour emphasizes fairytale, perfect, princess and life- affirming dream. I, myself, barely got out of this alive. What is the expected bridal response to finding your prince, your dream and the sum total of your existence? Spend thousands of dollars to prove it.

Oh, goody. And, yes, it leads to the conclusion of our Aurora’s next statement…

“Everything is so wonderful.”

I understand human beings each have particular moments in which this is the case. But that is the point: moments, not constantly. Dizzy young females, often caught in a twitterpated love haze of everything being seemingly perfect, are, inevitably, set up for a great big fall.

I admit to being a hopeless romantic; I get the hearts, the flowers and yes, the princess dream being sold. But, we do our females a disservice if “princess” is the only thing we set before them as most valuable and important. Where are the doctors inventing cures? Where are the airplane pilots delivering food supplies to a third world country? Where are the soldiers fighting and saving lives?

In teaching “Everything is so wonderful” as the dominant message, we fail to prepare are females for when everything, sooner or later…is not.

And that’s where another image needs to present itself: the warrior.

I recently came across one such message. A little girl, dressed in warrior attire, with a “Predator” mask on her head, stood strong, ready for battle. And the caption read as follows:

“Not all girls want to be a princess.”

 In today’s culture, we’re getting better with this message, but we still have a lon-n-n-n-g way to go. We have to give our females more than one aspiration to look at. And, as we present them with multiple and varied choices, we have to make it completely acceptable for them to question, challenge and even reject the princess option if that’s what they choose to do.

What if, like the artist’s renderings, we were able to capture and create that?

Copyright © 2018 by Sheryle Cruse