Friday, September 29, 2017

Be Inscribed...


The Thermometer or the Thermostat?


 

“For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he...”

Proverbs 23:7

Senator Cory Booker, on an appearance of “The Daily Show,” recently shared a powerful lesson with the audience:

“My father told me there are two ways to go through life: as a thermometer or as a thermostat. A thermometer: whatever someone says about you, you go up or down. A thermostat: you set the temperature.”

Both the thermometer and the thermostat reflect life and its issues, including our stance on addiction and recovery.

And our choice has significant ramifications concerning health, well-being and prosperity. Each option offers its inevitable results.

So, it might be worth our while to ponder what those very results may mean for us.

First, the thermometer: its appeal is that self-gratifying moment. It doesn’t require much work. You just let your feelings rip.

“A fool vents all his feelings. But a wise man holds them back.”

Proverbs 29:11

There’s no requirement for patience or self-control. The thermometer is when we yell at a cashier or give the finger to the driver who cut off in traffic. And, of course, this option is present when those of us addicts run headlong into our destructive obsessions. The thermometer is the refusal to face and deal with our ugly truth. It is not interested in healthy change, boundaries or saying “no” to our wants.

The thermometer reacts, here and now, with no sense of later consequences.

And we all engage in it; we all blow it. It’s human nature to do so.

Still, that humanity doesn’t cancel another simultaneous reality dwelling within us:

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.”

Galatians 5:22-23

Yes, there is some hope here.

Still, this in-dwelling necessitates our active tapping into it. We must prioritize, decide and put it into practice. And, we have that ability to do that.

But do we have the willingness?

“If ye be willing and obedient, ye shall eat the good of the land.”

Isaiah 1:19

Eh... that’s a bit “if-y-er.”

The willingness involved here is the surrender to our “Higher Power.” It is the admission we are screwed up and vulnerable. It is the “I want to, want to change” step.

Willingness need not be perfect, just honest, at least, as honest as our tricky hearts afford us...

“The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?”

Jeremiah 17:9

And, let us never forget; there is always Divine good news, to spite our seemingly hopeless human state of being...

“The Lord is not slack concerning his promise, as some men count slackness; but is longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.”

2 Peter 3:9

We are not alone in our flawed, addicted, troubled existences. We are not sentenced to the unforgiving fate of the thermometer’s negative consequences.

We can make another choice: the thermostat.

Indeed, the thermostat challenges the instant gratification, opting for the long term “big picture” instead. That involves dealing with ourselves.

“Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.”

Proverbs 4:23

“Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts: And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.”

Psalms 139:23-24

It is the decision to work, to take the harder, higher road.

And no, that is not fun.

Nevertheless, it is critical to the stewardship which produces the more fulfilling, longer term rewards we desire.

“That every one of you should know how to possess his vessel in sanctification and honor.”

1 Thessalonians 4:4

We are all on a continuum of this stewardship principle.

And again, it’s not about perfection; rather, it’s about prioritization. It is the personal work of pursuing what matters to us.

“Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts: And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.”

Psalms 139:23-24 surfaces yet again. The challenge targets our thought processes.

What is our attitude about our beloved vices, real change and actual health?

We are thinking something about each issue.

Is it closer to disease and self-destruction or health and prosperity?

We can choose.

And for many of us, an additional vital issue to challenge is “the big payoff.”

What do we honestly believe about the rewards attached to forsaking our dysfunctions?

Is the prize nonexistent?

Does it pale in comparison to the instant gratification of our familiar addictions, disorders and vices?

Are we willing to embark on imperfect change and choose something other than that reliable object of our affections?

Are we willing to relinquish control of our lives to the Creator of us all?

The thermostat asks these loaded questions with some famous “Twelve Step” principles in tow...

Step number one...

We admitted we were powerless over our addiction/compulsion - that our lives had become unmanageable.

Step number two...

We came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

Step number three...

We made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.

Step number eleven...

We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.

Step number twelve...

Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to addicts, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

In all of our struggles, questions and decisions, we need to understand there is, indeed, a big “payoff,” a Divine creation for each of us...

“Beloved, I wish above all things that thou mayest prosper and be in health, even as thy soul prospereth.”

3 John 1:2

“Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us.”

Ephesians 3:20

And it exists within the framework of the thermostat. It exists when we recognize our feelings can run amok and wreak havoc unless we submit to Divine help and order. It is the decision to choose delayed gratification over impulse.

It is the realization life is not a “one-time only” event. It is ongoing, needing our stamina, discipline and, when we fail, the implementation of merciful, forgiving grace.

No matter where we are in life, in the addiction/recovery spectrum, each of us is faced with the thermometer-thermostat decision.

It is a daily reality, requiring our choice.

What do we choose right now?

Copyright © 2017 by Sheryle Cruse

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

For Every Comment, For Every Like


 

I recently came across an image post on the internet. It was a female’s body, in workout gear. And it was accompanied by this statement:

“For Every Comment, I’ll do 10 sit ups, For Every Like, I’ll do 5 squats. Go, go, go!”

Furthermore, this post was also followed by a series of emoticons to emphasize its message: three arm curled biceps and one gold trophy.

(Sigh... Here we go again...)

Exercise, goals, striving for improvement/perfection...This is where I squirm, faced with posts as these.

Indeed, there is much emphasis on fitness in today’s culture. There are countless gyms, trainers, exercise equipment, programs, workout clothes and shoes, as well as a variety of athletic activities from which to choose. It’s overwhelming.

Yet there’s still a rise in eating disorders and in such health issues as childhood obesity and Type 2 Diabetes. How do we explain that?

I believe it has a lot to do with focus and priority, the personal, daily decision to put exercise and health in a healthy balance for our lives.

For God, in fact, tells us that, yes, there is some benefit to exercise...

“For bodily exercise profits little: but godliness is profitable to all things, having promise of the life that now is, and of that which is to come.”

1 Timothy 4:8

It lowers blood pressure, combats heart disease; it also improves circulation and mood, just to name a few positive results.

But, like anything used to excess, it can harm, even kill. That’s what it could have done for me, back in the day, when I exercised for six or more hours a day, while starving myself at the same time. That was not God’s Will. That was not profitable.

“For God is not a God of disorder but of peace…”

1 Corinthians 14:33

So what is profitable? Moderate exercise that is a part of life, but not our ENTIRE life. If exercise is preventing you from experiencing other people and things in your life, to the point of disruption, that is not profitable.

So, this importance of “every like and comment,” where did it start?

I believe its genesis is the heart, usually that of a wounded heart...

“Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.”

Proverbs 4:23

 “For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.”

Matthew 6:21; Luke 12:34

Long story short: we believe the solution to our pain is found in the external, including the external appearance.

“‘…man looks on the outward appearance...’”

1 Samuel 16:7

We shortchange ourselves, not taking into account the entirety of the outward appearance situation, especially from a spiritual perspective...

“‘…For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.’”

1 Samuel 16:7

Yet, we value other people’s validation over God’s, more often than not. I suppose, one can argue, it’s because with man, there is the 3-D evidence. God, is nebulous; we view Him via the if-y faith tactic.

So, in our hearts somewhere, perhaps God is not “as real” as other people... and their opinions of us.

And that can set us up for a snare...

“The fear of man bringeth a snare...”

Proverbs 29:25

We fear other people’s disapproval, along with our own fragile sense of self. We want to belong; we want to be accepted, liked and included...

“Do not be conformed to this world...”



Yet God tells us there is health and blessing if we prioritize Him, above anything of this world, appearance issues included.

“Beloved, I wish above all things that you may prosper and be in health, even as your soul prospers.”

3 John 1:2

“...whoso putteth his trust in the LORD shall be safe.”

Proverbs 29:25

“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”


Doing so is more important and beneficial than any like, comment or opinion. Do we want something which is fleeting or something which lasts? It’s up to us to decide.

Therefore, let’s view ourselves, most importantly, through God’s eyes and comments, not anyone else’s.

“Since you were precious in my sight… I have loved you…”

Isaiah 43:4

“The LORD hath appeared of old unto me, saying, ‘Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore with lovingkindness have I drawn thee.’”

Jeremiah 31:3

And let that influence how we take care of ourselves, including outward appearance and exercise matters.

 “Don't you know that you yourselves are God's temple and that God's Spirit lives in you?”

1 Corinthians 3:16

Let’s believe that and accept that in everything we do!

Copyright © 2017 by Sheryle Cruse

 

Study the Past


Note To Self


Name Calling


Progression


Thursday, September 28, 2017

Addiction: The Dissolving Cotton Candy


 

I am a sucker for all things cute; therefore, I frequently find myself checking out various animal gifs online.

A recent one which captivated my attention was of a raccoon and some cotton candy. Has anyone else seen it?
 

A raccoon grabs a significant hunk of cotton candy and, like raccoons are prone to do, quickly rushes to a water source to “wash it” before eating it.

And then hard, cruel reality presents itself: the cotton candy dissolves in the water, instantly slipping through the little guy’s tiny hands, distressing and confusing our friend. You can almost hear him cry, “No! No! Come back!”

This gif made me think about addiction. We are, in essence, this little raccoon, aren’t we? We decide on and chase our cotton candy addiction, convinced it will satisfy us. And then, somehow, right before our eyes, its solution promise dissolves. It didn’t deliver; it didn’t last.

“Go and cry unto the gods which ye have chosen; let them deliver you in the time of your tribulation.”

Judges 10:14

And, here we are, left confused and lost. Now what do we do?

Well, cue God, right?

“Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.”

Isaiah 41:10

But, do we?

That seems to be the dilemma.

Here’s where Eve, a raccoon and each of us all share something in common...

“And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes...”

Genesis 3:6

One can argue the phrase “eye candy” started here.

 (I know, bad pun, bad pun).

Still, we seem to be captivated with the beautiful, alluring object of our affection. It somehow sells us on the answer of eternal satisfaction, love, happiness and freedom from pain and fear.

And so, going with that hard sell, we soon find it in our hands, attempting to hold it forever, allowing it to make everything right in our lives.

But, no matter how hard we try to hang on, it dissolves in the midst of our beings. We try to grasp and chase, but it is gone. We torture ourselves by asking questions like “What could I have done to make it last?”

Answer: nothing.

That’s a difficult answer to hear, let alone, accept.

Yet, accept we must. It’s the bedrock of the Twelve Steps:

Step number one...

We admitted we were powerless over our addiction/compulsion - that our lives had become unmanageable.

Step number two...

We came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

Step number three...

We made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.

Step number eleven...

We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.

Step number twelve...

Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to addicts, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

So, yes, Psalm 118:8-9 is in full effect...

"It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man.
It is better to trust in the LORD  than to put confidence in princes."


No, God is not cotton candy. Or, more specifically...

God is not a man, that he should lie; neither the son of man, that he should repent: hath he said, and shall he not do it? Or hath he spoken, and shall he not make it good.”

Numbers 23:19

We are not to trust anything manmade. And, let’s face it, our addictions are manmade: they are faulty, imperfect human interpretations of what God should be to us. We craft them for ourselves because we operate under the delusion that they work.

They don’t.

Again, what happened as the raccoon tried to wash his cotton candy?

“What profiteth the graven image that the maker thereof hath graven it; the molten image, and a teacher of lies, that the maker of his work trusteth therein, to make dumb idols? Woe unto him that saith to the wood, Awake; to the dumb stone, Arise, it shall teach! Behold, it is laid over with gold and silver, and there is no breath at all in the midst of it.”

Habakkuk 2:18-19

Repeatedly, through failure after failure, we see how our trusted answers did not come through. There were never meant to do so.

Only God...

"For the LORD will be your confidence,
And will keep your foot from being caught."
Proverbs 3:26

He is not a man that He should lie...

And He is not cotton candy, that He should disappear.

Let’s, therefore, learn from the raccoon- and face the reality of our own cotton candy, whatever it may be.

 

Copyright © 2017 by Sheryle Cruse

 

Name’s Sake (No Good Deed Goes Unpunished)


 

A friend of mine who is experiencing some painful family issues has repeatedly asked herself the “why” questions.

Why is this happening to me?

Why am I being treated like this?

Why is my loved one acting in such an ugly manner?

She has been blindsided by a situation and a relationship she never dreamed was possible, rife with betrayal, deception and slander. This was once a close, bonded relationship, one filled with unconditional love and trust.

So, the events over the last few years were a definite shock.

“Brother will betray brother to death, and a father his child; and children will rise up against parents and cause them to be put to death.”

Matthew 10:21

This wasn’t supposed to happen.

So, why did it?

The question often produces, unfortunately, only unsatisfying silences, with, perhaps, some exceptions, as found in scripture...

“But all these things will they do unto you for my name's sake, because they know not him that sent me.”

John 15:21
“And ye shall be hated of all men for my name's sake: but he that endureth to the end shall be saved.”

Matthew 10:22

 “Then shall they deliver you up to be afflicted, and shall kill you: and ye shall be hated of all nations for my name's sake.”

Matthew 24:9

I know, it’s not comforting. But there appears to be a theme here.

“...for my name's sake.”

We’ve all heard the phrase, “no good deed goes unpunished.”

This statement is also not comforting, largely because it flies in the face of the Godly principles we’ve staked our faith on: good triumphs over evil, we will be blessed for our kind deeds and God is a just God.

So, how do we reconcile this with a situation in which evil appears to be winning, wicked actions are rewarded and God seems to be absent, incompetent or non-existent?

Once again, we return to our theme...

“...for my name's sake.”

Living our spiritual journey, our faith will be tested; it’s a case of when, not if that testing occurs.

No one is immune. It is part of not just humanity, but the spiritual experience as well.

So, like it or not, that means like Master, like servant...

“The disciple is not above his master, nor the servant above his lord.”

Matthew 10:24

Sooner or later, we’ll encounter hurt and betrayal. After all, Jesus had Judas.

“But Jesus said unto him, ‘Judas, betrayest thou the Son of man with a kiss?’”

Luke 22:48

(Check out Luke 22:3-48 for the entire gory story).

So, what makes you and I think we’d get out of our lives unscathed?

And then, complicating matters further (because, hey, life is already way too simple and easy, right?), we have to deal with our recovery issues on top of everything.

No easy feat, especially when boundaries are often blurry, at best, not everyone we encounter is in a healthy, love and life affirming place and, oh yeah, “hurting people hurt people” is in full force.

Goody.

No, it’s more like good deed rubber, meet some getting punished road.

Here’s, therefore, where we need to get a bit mercenary about our health, well-being and yes, recovery. We need to remember how people vary widely- and their thoughts, motivations and issues do as well.

So, with that reality, we have the perfect storm for betrayals and persecutions of countless scenarios.

The players involved may or may not be aware of that. I’ve heard it said in my own faith walk how human beings are tools either in the hand of God (good) or in the hands of the devil (evil). We play a role in that; and often, yes, we can be deceived and misguided. It would be ideal and much easier if everyone always choose to be agents for good.

But we live in a real world with free will and matching free moral agent human beings who make choices- and not all of them are loving, informed or harmless choices.

Still more great news to ponder.

Yet ponder we must.

And, as we think about the varying, often unpleasant, circumstances we encounter, we need to have our reality check/action plan readied concerning our response when life presents itself.

“The disciple is not above his master, nor the servant above his lord.”

Matthew 10:24

Nothing Pollyanna about this and it certainly doesn’t make it feel any easier as we encounter and endure hardship of being hurt and betrayed from seemingly unlikely directions.

Scripture, again, reminds us...

“Woe unto the world because of offences! For it must needs be that offences come; but woe to that man by whom the offence cometh!”

Matthew 18:7

The definition of “woe” means:

“great sorrow or distress; things that cause sorrow or distress; troubles.”

So, yes...

Woe is betrayal.

Woe is slander.

Woe is deceit.

Woe is the unexpected, unloving behavior from our most unexpected loved one.

Again, Jesus had woe from Judas.

And again, it comes back to our theme...

“...for my name's sake.”

Therefore, a core element of our battle plan, in spite of painful, unfair incidents, needs to employ Ephesians 6:7...

 “With good will doing service, as to the Lord, and not to men.”

Life is tricky, filled with unanswered questions. One can drive himself/herself crazy trying to answer the “Judas kiss” kind of experience we face from those “least likely” individuals.

A lot can be chalked up to “things happen.”

A lot can be chalked up to “life is unfair.”

And yes, again, there are things which fall under the “name’s sake” classification.

“If the world hates you, you know that it has hated Me before it hated you. If you were of the world, the world would love its own; but because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, because of this the world hates you.  Remember the word that I said to you, 'A slave is not greater than his master.' If they persecuted Me, they will also persecute you; if they kept My word, they will keep yours also.

John 15:18-20

So, it is important to bear this in mind, coupled with the seemingly impossible directive given to us concerning our troubled feelings/responses...

 “Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”

John 14:27

None of this invalidates our pain, our heartbreak or our persecution.

Rather, it’s to remind us there is more going on than just our finite experiences- and understandings of them.

“For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory;”

2 Corinthians 4:17

There is, in fact, a Glory principle in effect; and it doesn’t require we feel the positive feelings of that Glory...

 “But the God of all grace, who hath called us unto his eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after that ye have suffered a while, make you perfect, stablish, strengthen, settle you.”

1 Peter 5:10

Now if we are children, then we are heirs--heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory.”

Romans 8:17

So, perhaps, instead of asking our “why questions,” we should, instead, ask such things as...

What spiritual lesson is being taught to me?

How can I embody the Savior’s behaviors? (Yes, I know, that rhymes).

What is the Glory test here?

It is unrealistic enough to be believe we will be unchallenged and have an easy, pain-free life experience.

Likewise, in the faith realm, when we encounter offense and human experiences which make us feel judged, betrayed and persecuted, it also unrealistic to blame that stuff solely on a human being. There is also a spiritual warfare element added to the equation...

“For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.”

Ephesians 6:12

And yes, that especially applies to the “Name sake” issue.

So, it would do us all some good to bear this in mind as we deal with whatever “blindsiding” situation we face. We are not above suffering.

But, if we remember this “Name sake” principle, we also realize how, yes, we are also not removed from a deeper promise.

“If ye be reproached for the name of Christ, happy are ye; for the spirit of glory and of God resteth upon you: on their part he is evil spoken of, but on your part he is glorified.”

1 Peter 4:14

Indeed, it’s not about being punished at all. Rather, it is about the Divine reward of Savior resemblance.

So, let’s choose to experience that.

Copyright © 2017 by Sheryle Cruse