Say the Right Things...

Dear Self...

Walk Away...

Gaslighting's Laughter

“Gaslighting’s Laughter” explores the harm that can come from manipulative laughter at our expense.

https://www.elephantjournal.com/2019/10/gaslightings-laughter-explores-the-harm-that-can-come-from-manipulative-laughter-at-our-expense/

A Narcissist...

I'll Get Back To You...

No Remote

Honey Bear

Most of us wouldn’t think twice about a honey bear.

And, likewise, most of us are familiar with the Biblical account of the golden calf the Israelites worshipped, just before Moses arrived with the Ten Commandments (Exodus 32:1-35). Impatient as they were, waiting for the blessings to hit their lives, they concluded if they created their own visible god, they’d be happier and finally have their dreams.

Eh… not so fast…

And that brings me to the innocuous honey bear. At first glance, I’d never view it as an idol. As a child, I remember it was there with the maple syrup and the strawberry jam, sitting on my family’s kitchen table. That’s all.

But, as I spiraled into my eating disorders, as I reached the paralyzing lows of anorexia and frantic desperation of bulimia, I turned to an off the wall strategy: the honey bear, or more specifically, arts and crafts with the honey bear.

Please bear (pun intended) with me.

As I was struggling with my eating disorders, painful issues and stressors on full blast, I had the idea to distract myself. Yes, that was my answer. If I could just keep myself occupied enough, I’d be okay.

So, after my college classes, I turned to a honey bear I emptied on one of my recent binges. I thought I’d do something creative with it and keep myself busy. I decided to spray paint the bear gold. That’s right, gold.

And, over time, that gold bear turned into several. I remember one Saturday, when my roommate’s boyfriend dropped by, the confused reaction as he saw me on the newspaper-covered floor, with at least ten honey gold honey bears drying out around me.

Just another college girl, huh?

I truly believed if I created enough of these artsy crafty gold bears, my problems would go away; I could be happy. I was desperate… and horribly wrong. I was no different than the calf worshipping Israelites, believing their created idol would answer their lives with happily ever after.

And then that didn’t happen. It was never the answer.

You’ve probably never spray painted a honey bear, but you’ve reached for something: alcohol, drugs, relationships, achievements, for example.

All are idols of some sort, because all of these attempts try to replace The Most High in our lives. And He’s quite clear how He thinks about that approach:

“You shall have no other gods before me.

You shall not make for yourself a graven image,

or any likeness of anything that is in heaven above, 

or that is in the earth beneath, 

or that is in the water under the earth;

you shall not bow down to them or serve them;

for I the Lord your God am a jealous God,

visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children 

to the third and the fourth generation of those who hate me, 

but showing steadfast love to thousands of those

who love me and keep my commandments.”

Exodus 20:3-6

Years later, I see the futility and the insanity, believing my focus on the honey bear’s seeming artistic possibilities were the “cure” to my anorexia, bulimia and pain. I kept looking in the wrong direction.

 “Go and cry unto the gods which ye have chosen; let them deliver you in the time of your tribulation.”

Judges 10:14

“What profiteth the graven image that the maker thereof hath graven it; the molten image, and a teacher of lies, that the maker of his work trusteth therein, to make dumb idols? Woe unto him that saith to the wood, Awake; to the dumb stone, Arise, it shall teach! Behold, it is laid over with gold and silver, and there is no breath at all in the midst of it.”

Habakkuk 2:18-19

And isn’t that really what addiction is, in the context of idolatry? The wrong direction?

Meanwhile, there is a RIGHT direction…

“My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion forever.”

Psalms 73:26

“But it is good for me to draw near to God: I have put my trust in the Lord GOD, that I may declare all thy works.”

Psalms 73:28

“Remember the former things of old: for I am God, and there is none else; I am God, and there is none like me,”

Isaiah 46:9

And there’s His response to our lives, struggles, addictions and disorders…

“He sent his word, and healed them, and delivered them from their destructions.”

Psalms 107:20

To what are you seeking your deliverance? Idolatry of any kind never works. The Most High, however, does. Let’s choose Him for our lives.

It bears considering now, doesn’t it?

Copyright © 2019 by Sheryle Cruse

Beyond the Mask

As a child, I dressed up as Tinker Bell and Cinderella for Halloween. Back then, there was less emphasis on realistic depictions of fictional characters. And I had a few major strikes against me. First, these two characters were both blondes; I had brown hair. And then, there was the plastic-y kind of “costume,” resembling more of a picnic tablecloth than fairy or princess attire.

And the topper? Well, that, of course, would have to be the cheap plastic mask, fastened to a child’s head through a painful elastic band. Somehow, that notorious head band was always hanging uncomfortably around the ear area and snapped with slingshot ferocity each time one tried to adjust the mask, in vain attempts to make the costume more comfortable and wearable. I have many memories of misplaced eye holes askew as I tried not to bump into the other kids and the neighbors’ front doors.

There were mixed results.

If any of you have had similar childhood Halloween memories, you know that those cheap plastic masks were not fooling anyone. No kid ever looked like Tinker Bell, Cinderella, Batman or the Incredible Hulk; no one was fooled into believing the child was a particular character. It was obvious. It was a mask.

Years later, dealing with my personal recovery from eating disorders, the mask issue takes on greater significance. We’ve all heard about masks; we wear different ones to function in society and our individual life roles. In fact, for a lot of us dealing with addiction and recovery, the masks contributed to our poor choices and our addictions. And, as is the case so often with addiction, we, the mask wearers, were the last to know and see it. As we struggle to navigate our lives, trying not to bump into calamities of our own making, everyone looks at us, unconvinced of the image we try to project. We may believe we’re presenting a together person, but other people only see our eyes poking out of askew eye holes.

Like John Lennon once sang, “one thing you can’t hide is when you’re crippled inside.”

The dictionary definition of mask is as follows:

“face covering to hide identity: a covering for the face, worn by somebody to conceal his or her identity.”

But how many of us get that confused with our real selves? And, in doing exactly that, how many of us hit snags and relapses in our recoveries, that is, if we even start one in the first place?

This time of year is a reminder of masks; Halloween is all about pretending to be someone or something else. But there’s a difference between pretending and lying. When it comes to our recovery, pretending, to the point of lying, never promotes health and healing. We may see or believe that the image, the lie or the relapse appears in a certain light, even a flattering light. We look out of askew eyeholes, never quite seeing things accurately. However, sooner or later, we will stumble over that mask. Scripture states it best…

“For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known...”

1 Corinthians 13:12-13

Truth pops up. Even in our most sober and on track states, we’re still not getting the whole picture. So, then, what would ever make us think we could see things clearly when we’re in the midst of a chaotic relapse?

Answer? Pride. Ah, yes, one of the subtlest threats to any recovery- our own pride. Pride convinces us we don’t need to stay on our programs, connect with our sponsors, attend meetings or be honest. No. Pride reassures us we’re in great shape, we’re doing okay on our own. Pride tells us to be lone rangers; pride shames us by condemning the need to get and maintain help in our lives. Pride keeps telling us, “You have it under control. Just keep doing what you’re doing.”

But pride always overpromises and under-delivers. Again, the famous scripture about pride itself goes as follows…

“Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.”

Proverbs 16:18

And then there are these two little ditties…

 “When pride comes, then comes disgrace...”

Proverbs 11:2

“Before his downfall a man's heart is proud...”

Proverbs 18:12

Yeah, it might do us some good to pay attention to those warnings.

I know, back when I was in a manic bulimic phase of my eating disorder behavior during college, I believed no one else could see what was going on with me. My increasingly puffy face and my one hundred pound weight gain were, certainly not obvious. Oh, no. Pride kept telling me I was doing okay. After all, I was still regularly keeping up with my classes and making the dean’s list. So, no problem, right? Meanwhile, my desperate behaviors caused me to not only binge and purge, but also steal my roommates’ food and dumpster dive for garbage when my compulsion for food ran rampant. How do you convince others you really have it so together when you’re caught scrounging the garbage for food? It’s not such a believable mask then, is it?

Pride came. Pride brought disgrace. Pride made sure that a downfall was poised, waiting to happen at a moment’s notice.

But all is not totally hopeless. For as much as we may have wrongly relied on our addictions, disorders and deluded, masked states of pride, we can also make another choice. The Book of Proverbs is often regarded as a book of wisdom in the Bible. And, one of the things I love about it is that it isn’t just a list of “don’t do this” instructions, it also contains a healthy, positive “do” option. For instance…

“When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.”

Proverbs 11:2

“Before his downfall a man's heart is proud, but humility comes before honor.”

Proverbs 18:12

Humility is mentioned more than once. Hmmm. There seems to be a theme here.

Twelve Steps Programs are built on that exact theme.

1. We admitted we were powerless over addiction - that our lives had become unmanageable.
2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.
9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
10. Continued to take personal inventory, and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.
11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to addicts, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

There’s no mention that pride, image or masks of any kind whatsoever will improve our lives. Honesty, humility and reliance on The Most High though? Well, that is mentioned everywhere!

So, where are we with that reality? Again, the Halloween holiday focuses on masks, and pretending to be someone or something we are not. How do we live that concept, beyond Halloween? How do masks infiltrate our lives and our recovery from addictions and disorders? Are we wearing the mask or is it wearing us?

Replace the mask with the truth. After all, the famous scripture goes…

“…the truth will set you free."

John 8:32

Let’s wear the truth, instead of the mask in our recovery and in our lives!

Copyright © 2019 by Sheryle Cruse

How They Treat You...

Thoughts...

You're Crazy To Everyone...

Enough

“Enough” explores our view and relationship with being and doing enough.

https://www.elephantjournal.com/2019/10/enough-explores-our-view-and-relationship-with-being-and-doing-enough/

Blorch. Exactly.

First Rule of Mental Health

Actions

JADE

“No is a complete sentence.”

I have come across people who cannot accept my no, on various issues, including, but not limited to, being accommodating about doing what they wish instead of doing what’s best for me. Cancer has changed that because it had to change the acquiescence that I once gave others.

Twelve Step Recovery Programs often include the acronym, “J.A.D.E.”

And, since my diagnosis, I’ve discovered JADE has covered the bases, falling under the statement, “No is a complete sentence.”

I may be taken behind the woodshed and shot for that perspective.

How dare I?

How dare I be displeasing?

Yet, here I am, Ladies and Gentlemen, often placed on trial, asked to prove my case.

Therefore, JADE…

Justify:

Right after I was diagnosed, medical opinion asserted that a simple (hah, simple) Lumpectomy would be all that was necessary. Let’s schedule me, then, for that procedure.

So, when I informed my surgeon I decided differently, I was met with surprise. I decided to have the more radical, in some peoples’ minds, choice of a bilateral mastectomy.

Taken aback when I voiced my decision, my surgeon immediately asked me about my choice.

I gave my reasons which were personal, as this whole Breast cancer context is, indeed, personal. But, looking back on it now, I see it more as “I don’t need to justify myself to you; it’s my body.” My surgeon didn’t ask me about my decision for “health reasons.” After all, no matter what surgical procedure was performed, both would accomplish the same goal: to remove the cancerous tumor.

No, my surgeon wanted to know because it didn’t align itself with medical expectation, meaning, the surgeon would tell me the medical opinion of what was best… and I’d follow that decision, without question.

And no, that didn’t happen.

“No was a complete sentence to a Lumpectomy; “Yes,” however, was my complete sentence to removing my breasts.”

Done. I decided. And I would not change my mind.

What do you feel you need to justify to others? What you choose as a profession? Who you love? Being a non-conformist, in any way? Do you feel you need to justify your entire existence?

Be on the lookout for interactions which want to shove you into a “not good enough” corner. Pay attention to the “J” of JADE.

Argue:

This word is another connected element to the J.A.D.E. principle. It can function as a synonym to the previously discussed, “Justify.” I say that because, like “Justify,” the word “Argue” seems to come to the forefront in some interactions which can involve another person’s inability or willingness to deal with our “no” response.

Once I made my decision about my bilateral mastectomy, my surgeon next assumed I would jump on the reconstruction bandwagon. I would get new breasts now. After all, leaving my deformed chest like that simply was unheard of.

That is, it was unheard of until my surgeon heard of my answer.

I was adamant about not undergoing further surgeries. No reconstruction for me, thank you. I was at peace with being breast-less, which appeared to mortify my surgeon.

There was a bit of argument over my decisions; reconstruction was just the tip of the iceberg.

And I say that as a caution concerning other peoples’ agendas. I cannot say for certain, what were my surgeon’s motivations. But I did have my gut reaction and my conversations with other women about their experiences to go on.

And I got an abundance of intel, in my research and conversations with other women. Through both, I discovered some surgeons tried to pressure their patients to get reconstructive breast surgery because they make more money that way. I heard experiences of some women who were coerced into not only getting reconstruction, but also getting a breast size they didn’t want, all because the surgeon wanted that size for them.

As I held my ground and “argued” my choices with my surgeon, I still wasn’t heard.

Okay, then. Let’s try something else.

How about involving the hospital charge nurse and patient advocate about my frustrations? Yep, that did the trick.

I no longer wanted to engage in the back and forth with my surgeon. I was an informed woman; I made thoughtful choices that were best for me. I would no longer argue about that.

Arguing can be quite pointless, especially if the other party is neither willing, nor able, to hear you and I out. Pressure, coercion, name calling, insults and dismissive attitudes can all surface. These mechanisms exist because it is about agenda from the other party. Whatever he/she wants, perhaps, in their minds, is more important than what you and I want.

Pay attention if your gut check is screaming that to you. Major breast surgery and arguing with my surgeon may appear to be an extreme example, but, in your own circumstances, do you see any similarities?

Are you feeling pressured? Coerced? Dismissed? Is someone telling you that what they want for you is more important than what you want?

How much arguing are you having to do right now about a certain issue? Do you feel the force of someone else’s agenda?

Defend:

“Defend” can quickly surface with “Justify and “Argue.”

How many of us are put on the defense, simply for asserting our position or rights?

Again, check for agenda and coercion. See any?

How does someone react when you disagree with them? Do you desire to go in another direction? Do you get pushback? Are you on the defense?

Concerning my surgeon, “Defend” often popped up in my interactions with this person. There was a constant battle of wills, even though it was my body and life that were directly affected. So, naturally, one would think, it would be me then, to decide, what choices I made concerning my body and life.

But it, of course, wasn’t that simple.

Upon recovering from my surgery, I was on the defense, again. I quickly encountered the “God complex” from my surgeon, feeling like I was little more than Dr. Frankenstein’s creature to be molded according to the great doctor’s vision.

Not helpful.

Again, it calls into question the matter of agenda. What was my surgeon’s? To get me on the expensive cancer conveyor belt of procedures, treatments and tests? There certainly wasn’t any “bedside manner” or interest in me as a human being.

At my most vulnerable, perhaps, I was still having to fight, not even the cancer, but the people who claimed to treat the cancer.

Actions speak louder than words.

So, again, check the action. Are you having to take action to defend yourself?

Simple question: yes or no.

Answer it and act accordingly.

Explain:

And lastly, there is this word in the acronym.

This is, perhaps, the final complexity we bump against when you and I find ourselves “stuck in a moment.”

This might be the final attempt to pressure us when we say “no” to an otherwise, wanted “yes.”

Long after my surgery, I encountered more people, who, upon finding out about my diagnosis and choices since, asked me if I underwent reconstruction and when, exactly, I would get breasts, already.

Cue the temptation to explain my decision. Just add it to Justify. Argue. Defend.

However, “explain” is a bit more involved. It requires a detailed accounting of our actions…to people for whom it was none of their business.

I still remember the awkward silences, wide eyes and the restless fidgeting as people awaited my explanation as to why I didn’t get breasts. I’m getting better at just quietly staring away these incidents. I don’t need to explain myself, especially about something so personal.

But some people still, somehow, believe they are owed an explanation.

How about you?

How many times have you felt the need to explain your right to be yourself and make your choices? How many times have you been punished for doing otherwise?

JADE. A tidy little acronym, with so much hidden power held within it. When we think of Jade, typically, we often envision the gorgeous green gemstone. Something precious, something beautiful and of great value.

Perhaps we need to view the acronym in the same manner. Perhaps, we need to see it as the precious gem in the way we conduct our lives and have dignity in them.

We deserve to be respected for who we are and what choices we make, even if others disagree with them. Coercion from another person and manipulation to get us to fall in line, is not acceptable. It never has been; it never will be.

Live your life as this polished gem then. As you make your choices and live your life, be brilliant and unapologetic as you face a question, an interrogation and an abusive instance with the definitive statement:

“No is a complete sentence.”

You have nothing to prove to anyone else. Be yourself, instead.

Copyright © 2019 by Sheryle Cruse

Our Ultimate Beauty Tip?

Change is a constant in life. And, with my recovery work concerning disordered image issues, this principle has become abundantly clear.

I recently came across some beauty tips, published in 1908; they include the following from Amy Ayer's, Facts for Ladies, Cora Brown Potter's The Secrets of Beauty and Mysteries of Health and My Lady Beautiful, Or, The Perfection of Womanhood by Alice M. Long. I’ve included them, along with their original 1908 sales pitches.

Brace yourself.

 First, there are the meat facials…

"Many Parisian ladies, in the secrecy of their own chambers, on retiring at night, or some part of the day, bind their faces with thin slices of raw beef or veal. For several years a popular lady has used this remedy to feed the tissues of the face, with remarkable results. At thirty-eight she has the complexion and skin of a girl of eighteen."

My Two Cents…

I don’t care how young you look; you still smell like meat. Last time I checked, that was not a fragrance made by Chanel. Plus, let’s get real. How many ingénues do you actually see with beef on their faces?

 Moving next to the lard primer…

"A good base for makeup is rendered lard, made by pouring boiling water on lard in a basin... It is usually scented with oil verbena, though attar of roses is pleasanter, but more expensive."

My Two Cents…

Uh, it’s lard. That does not seem at all glamorous to me. Slather some on the roast beef, I guess, with the meat facials. Next!

 And now, how about some poison…

"The prescription of this ancient beautifier is 1-100 of a grain of arsenic and two grains of black pepper. One of these pills should be taken after dinner. It clears the complexion and brings a ruddy glow to the lips and cheeks, but should only be taken when the tongue is uncoated by fur in the morning, and never if there is any tendency to redness or roughness of the skin, or by those who suffer from flatulence."

My Two Cents…

Okay, several things here. First, isn’t arsenic a poison? How about if we have that nowhere near our faces? And then there’s the flatulence? Grateful not to live in 1908…

More poison…

"Complexion Improvers: Most of the preparations sold under this or similar names contain corrosive sublimate, perchloride of mercury. This powerful drug must be used with caution, as it produces marked alteration in, and hardening of, the skin... We can, fortunately, minimize or entirely remove the undesirable action of this drug by adding a little yolk of egg to the lotion."

My Two Cents…

Again with the poison? Yikes! Somehow, hardened skin doesn’t seem pleasant to me. But I suppose I’m a silly one.

And, of course, we must- we must- we must not forget the bust…

"Every well sexed woman desires a beautiful, well-rounded bust, and I am sure you are not an exception. As the emotions affect to a very great extent the female organs, and as these in turn affect the bust, it is essential, as you doubtless already understand, to refrain from indulgence in anger, grief, worry, jealousy, etc."

My Two Cents…

So, the key to a voluptuous bosom was simply having no disagreeable emotions whatsoever? Who knew? No problem!

Looking at these hundred year old beauty tips, they certainly seem ridiculous, don’t they?

But, as we make our way through these ancient, if not barbaric, beauty tips, we see that the methods to our image madness may have changed over the years, but the beauty importance sentiment is a still present, possibly harmful reality.

Think of crash diets like the Oreo diet, the cabbage soup diet and consuming cotton balls soaked with orange juice. Think of getting botulism injected into our faces. Think of the excessive wriggling and sucking in our stomachs, all to get into our skinny jeans. And these are just a few examples of our more “modern day” beauty tips. Suddenly, 1908 doesn’t sound so primitive.

 We’ve done some wacky things, in the name of beauty!

But one thing we’ve failed to do, in its pursuit, is look to God’s perspective. And let’s just see what HE says…

 “…I am fearfully and wonderfully made…”

Psalm 139:14

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart; and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.”

Proverbs 3:5-6

What if we pursued things which were God-ordained, not just the man-made, often wacky methods we usually chase?

“And let the beauty of the LORD our God be upon us: and establish thou the work of our hands upon us; yea, the work of our hands establish thou it.”

Psalms 90:17

“But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as by the Spirit of the Lord.”

2 Corinthians 3:18

What if? It’s worth considering, right?

We’ve already tried a variety of diets, disorders, regimes and methods, often to no avail. Let’s remember, God went to all of the trouble creating us. So, I think He can handle our details.

“Behold, I am the Lord, the God of all flesh. Is there anything too hard for Me?”

Jeremiah 32:27

“…I am God, and there is none else; I am God, and there is none like me. Declaring the end from the beginning, and from ancient times the things that are not yet done, saying, My counsel shall stand, and I will do all my pleasure… yea, I have spoken it, I will also bring it to pass; I have purposed it, I will also do it.”

Isaiah 46:9-11

Our temporary and supposedly clever “quick fixes” like meat facials, disordered exercise routines and crash diets, indeed, cannot take the place of a God Who knows exactly what He’s doing!

We need to apply that, then, as our everlasting beauty tip!

Copyright © 2019 by Sheryle Cruse

Our Hummingbird Ways?

I love hummingbirds. And here’s an interesting little factoid about them:

“Hummingbirds are continuously hours away from starving to death, and are able to store just enough energy to survive overnight.”

I immediately thought of my anorexic experiences.

I recount my mindset, offered in my book, “Thin Enough: My Spiritual Journey Through the Living Death Of An Eating Disorder.”

“… I knew that what I was doing was wrong, but I still kept going. I had to. Progress—just a few more pounds, then I’ll be done. So I’d continue every morning: six hours of boot camp torture on little or no food or water. I had gotten to the point now where I feared drinking water would make me fat.

Every morning, my heart and pulse would pound and race. I could feel throbbing from veins that were sticking out on the backs of my knees and the crooks of my elbows. Every morning, I would stand up, shaky, dizzy already, only to then have everything go black. And then, I’d wake up, lying on the floor. Passing out was now a regular part of my day.

I was scared now, not only for my health, but scared of the danger of being discovered. What if I did this in front of someone? You see, these daily blackout sessions always happened during my exercise routine at midnight. I started exercising at midnight because I could be alone for my required six-hour exercise punishment...”

I didn’t know it at the time, but I had my own obsessive hummingbird thing going on. It was driven by fear- and it didn’t have to be that way.

Fear had convinced me the absolute worst things in the world that could happen to me were eating and gaining weight. So, the torture game became “don’t eat- go as long, as far as you can without eating- just keep going.”

But, what I didn’t know was that this was not what God wanted for me. He didn’t want to punish me; that was not His Will towards me. This, rather, was, instead:

“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.”

Jeremiah 29:11

God never created me to be like the every frenetic hummingbird. He wanted me to have a life- and one which wasn’t running desperately on fumes.

“…I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.”’

John 10:10

The fear I was experiencing, driving me to emaciation, exhaustion and misery was not of God.

 “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.”

2 Timothy 1:7

 I didn’t know that at the time.

I didn’t know that fear is a spirit, distorting the truth of things; fear lies to us. It tries to convince us God doesn’t love us, God will fail us and life is a horrible, hopeless thing.

All lies.

God repeatedly tells us NOT to fear…

“Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.”

Isaiah 41:10

“Fear not: for I am with thee…”

Isaiah 43:5

“Fear not, little flock; for it is your Father's good pleasure to give you the kingdom.”

Luke 12:32

 “And he saith unto them, ‘Why are ye fearful, O ye of little faith?’ Then he arose, and rebuked the winds and the sea; and there was a great calm.”

Matthew 8:26

This last scripture struck me especially hard as I looked at the words “there was a great calm.”

Ever see a hummingbird? Not a lot of calm going on there.

And that’s the reality check. For those of us struggling with eating disorders and obsessive/compulsive thoughts and behaviors, are we acting more like a frantic hummingbird or a peaceful child of God? Where are we falling within that spectrum? We are somewhere.

So, wherever we are, how imperfectly we are, let’s first start with Psalm 46:10:

“Be still, and know that I am God…”

From there, let’s live as His Child. Let’s cease from our hummingbird ways.

Copyright © 2019 by Sheryle Cruse