Monday, December 31, 2018

What Am I Doing Later?


Revised Resolutions...


2019...


Not All Surprises Are Bad




In recovery from my disordered eating and image issues over the years, one thing I had to face was the complicated, unresolved father/daughter factor in my life. No, I did not get the loving father/daughter relationship I so craved.

It’s taken me years to connect the dots concerning my disordered mindset. Unfortunately, yes, the family environment I experienced played a role.

Families of people with Anorexia Nervosa:

•• Enmeshed, overprotective, conflict-avoiding

•• Unresponsive to patient’s self-expressions

Families of People with Bulimia Nervosa:

•• Parents are critical and detached

•• Characterized by hostile enmeshment

•• Non-nurturing

•• Emotionally unresponsive

Ohio State University FactSheet. Used with permission

Still, within that reality, I’ve had to look at a much bigger factor: the spiritual one. And a large part of my healing has come from seeing how God, as Father, intentionally chose, wanted, desired and loved me, regardless of what my human father did or did not do.

“Since you were precious in my sight… I have loved you…”

Isaiah 43:4

“I have chosen you and have not cast you away.”

Isaiah 41:9

“The LORD hath appeared of old unto me, saying, ‘Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore with lovingkindness have I drawn thee.’”

Jeremiah 31:3

 “The Lord your God in your midst, the Mighty One will save; He will rejoice over you with gladness, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing.”

Zephaniah 3:17

And, although I cannot change what was concerning my imperfect reality with my dad, I can choose to embrace the real and eternal truth of my father/daughter relationship with God, the ultimate Father.

In the popular television series, “Mad Men,” an episode entitled, “The Fog,” captured a beautiful exchange between the protagonist Don Draper and his daughter, Sally.

In the scene, father and daughter discuss the birth of the family’s second son. Everyone thought it would be a girl, to which Draper responds…

“I thought you were going to be a boy. Not all surprises are bad.”

This heartwarming bit of dialogue again reminds me of how God views each of us through His Fatherly, loving lens. We are specifically loved and chosen.

 All things were made by him; and without him was not anything made that was made.”

John 1:3

There was no regret or second thought about us, about who He created us to be.

Perhaps, you’ve not had the unconditional love experience with your parents. Maybe disorder and addiction have left their marks, fracturing family relationships and healthy self-perceptions. Don’t believe the lie you were a mistake, an accident, unplanned. Nothing could be further from the truth as far as God is concerned! You may have been a “surprise” to someone, but you have been intentionally, spiritually created, with purpose, by God, from the start.

Again…

“Since you were precious in my sight… I have loved you…”

Isaiah 43:4

“I have chosen you and have not cast you away.”

Isaiah 41:9

It’s not too late. Right now, God loves each of us, is thinking about us and desires a wonderful future, filled with restorative love, healing and blessings. Right now.

“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.”

Jeremiah 29:11

Therefore, choose to embrace a loving Father Who knew exactly what He was doing when He created you.

“...I am fearfully and wonderfully made…”

Psalm 139:14

And yes, you will be surprised at just how much, how completely and how uniquely, He will love and connect with you!

Indeed, not all surprises are bad!

Copyright © 2018 by Sheryle Cruse






Please Don’t Attack the Mirror




“Do you have eyes of flesh? Do you see as a mortal sees?”

Job 10:4

I recently saw this little guy, capturing the less than thrilled gaze we can often have of ourselves.


Been there lately?

Ah, that notorious mirror. It’s difficult to deal with it. Our desires, expectations and punishments are often all we see when we look into the glass.

Thankfully our view is vastly different from The Most High’s view.

 “…God does not see as humans see. Humans look at outward appearances, but the LORD looks into the heart."

1 Samuel 16:7

In my recovery process, a large element of healing has been in challenging the viewpoint I embrace as valuable, beautiful and worthwhile. Often, I’ve not chosen the healthy, inspirational or realistic image; death, disease and destruction have been more like it.

And yes, the physical aesthetics of beauty and appearance do come into play.

But what I have encountered more powerfully has been the viewpoint Elohim holds for each of us beyond the exterior. The fact is, sooner or later, we all come to a place in which we realize we are mortal- and imperfect (hate to break it to ya).

“For he knoweth our frame; he remembereth that we are dust.”

Psalms 103:14

And, when that time comes, what will we look to when a “perfect” face and body don’t quite materialize, let alone, last?

It is here where our Father’s viewpoint comes into crystal clear, hope-filled focus…

“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.”

Jeremiah 29:11

“But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as by the Spirit of the Lord.”

2 Corinthians 3:18

What we focus on the most DOES loom the largest in our lives.

Where’s your focus been lately?

Are you like this feline, fighting the mirror?

Dare to see beyond what appears obvious.

Dare to see with faith’s eye, a loving Father who, indeed, is working it all out in your life.

Dare to see that His valuable estimation of you as valuable, right now!

And, in this process, dare to make peace with your mirror!


Copyright © 2018 by Sheryle Cruse


From glory to glory, while going through hell




I love Winston Churchill’s sentiment:

“If you’re going through hell, keep going.”

Life is tough. Sooner or later, we’ll experience a trying situation which feels like hell. It isn’t actual hell, thank God. Nevertheless, the power of that notorious situation/trauma makes us feel tortured with pain, despair and hopeless evidence. Eating disorders, addictions, compulsions, loss and grief are just a few examples of things which can feel like hell, if, after all, torture is the calling card.

It’s painful and almost impossible to see future, life, possibility or God. We can, instead, much more easily see ourselves as failures, weak, forgotten and ruined. It’s, therefore, inevitable that we come to a screeching halt; we stop in the mire and can only feel ourselves sinking…down to where? Greater depths of hell and torture?

But that’s not God’s truth about us. Even in the middle of hopelessness, God is there…living…loving…working…

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.”

Romans 8:28

“Behold, I am the Lord, the God of all flesh. Is there anything too hard for Me?”

Jeremiah 32:27

It can be tempting to believe that in our self-defined hells, we’re going it alone. But we’re not. Psalm 23 reassures us…

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me…”

Psalm 23:4

And as we ‘keep going,” transformation, bit by bit, occurs…

 “But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as by the Spirit of the Lord.”

2 Corinthians 3:18

And “keep going” doesn’t necessarily mean a dramatic, larger than life display. It can be the tiniest effort, decision or prayer. It just needs to exist. God requires only a mustard seed of faith, not a mountain. Thank God for that!

And I believe we underestimate both God and ourselves about the power of our thoughts, words and actions. We can be one thought, word or deed away from breakthrough; we never know. But God does. And even when we fall short, God has decided and created the contingency plan for us. Jesus.

“…being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ.”

Philippians 1:6

Are we confident in that Truth? Are we confident in God’s involvement as we go through our different kinds of hell? Do we “keep going,” armed with trust in God, leading, guiding, helping and transforming our lives, even in the appearance of wreckage? We all need help in this area of the faith department.

We’re all in process. That applies even to the process of “going through hell.”

Are you going through hell right now? Are you stopping in it or moving through it? Regardless, God is too good of a God to leave you in the spot of despair forever; you WILL get through this, whatever “this” may be. Trust God; trust Him.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart; and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.”

Proverbs 3:5-6

God has much more for you!

“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.”

Jeremiah 29:11

Keep going!

Copyright © 2018 by Sheryle Cruse




Well, Actually


Stop Chasing People...


Practice These!


Sunday, December 30, 2018

When Did You Become One?


A New Alacrity?




“Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.”

Philippians 4:8

I once read a book on Harry Houdini. He was described as possessing a spirit of alacrity. What a great word. Its definition is that of “briskness, a cheerful readiness.”

Who’s tired already?

Indeed, this is the time of year when many of us are exhausted. Year’s end, overstimulated holidays, stress and whatever personal inventory of failures have all left us too tired to do much of anything, much less, anything requiring a brisk, cheerful readiness.

And now, of course, we have a new year to think about.

 Great.

At the risk of trotting out clichés, it is possible to start anew. Whatever the past year represents, it is history. The Most High’s very much present, here and now, as well as in the future. And He still makes things new…

 “Behold, I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth; shall ye not know it? I will even make a way in the wilderness, and rivers in the desert.”

Isaiah 43:19

Still, for those of us, weary from life and ourselves at large, this “new” talk seems far from our grasp. We may not feel up to the task of “new.” We may feel we’re too weak or inadequate.

And, to that, Elohim has a very direct response…

“And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.”

2 Corinthians 12:9

Fortunately, our Creator does not depend on our perfection or strength. Nothing would get accomplished if that was the standard.



So, the wakeup call we need to bear in mind is the difference between our thoughts (feelings) and that of The Most High’s.

 “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways my ways, says the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways, and My thoughts than your thoughts.”

Isaiah 55:8-9

“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.”

Jeremiah 29:11

And that includes the “new,” new year included.

It may be too much for you to entertain right now. That’s okay. That’s where an act of faith comes in.

"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of
what we do not see."
Hebrew 11:1

The mere fact that you’re struggling indicates there’s faith in you. You’re still here, there’s a reason for that reality. Your life is not solely up to you, anyway. Take that to your weary heart…

“Let not your heart be troubled: ye believe in God, believe also in me.”

John 14:1

“Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”

John 14:27

And so, dare, this next year, this new year, to believe The Most High has amazing things for you.

“Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us.”

Ephesians 3:20

Dare to meet this year, your life and Elohim, armed with your very own sense of alacrity.

Be cheerful; be ready for all He has for you!

“But as it is written, ‘Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him.’”

1 Corinthians 2:9

Copyright © 2018 by Sheryle Cruse








Anything That...


Clarity about the love...


What Kind of Difference?


One Hour a Day...


She's Still Blooming...


Detachment


Stop Comparing Traumas


Walking into 2019...


Friday, December 28, 2018

Steps To the New Year




My new year’s resolution is… or was (fill in the blank)…

Sound familiar?

Yes, it’s that time of year again. The infamous New Year’s resolutions have started and/or have been broken by now. How many of us feel “what’s the point?” Adding to that already negative experience, those of us in recovery can often feel all the more hopeless pressure and failure if we “resolved” to stop a behavior which relates to our addictions, compulsions and disorders. Be honest: what did you swear you’d do or never do again?

So, we’re into a brand new year. Are we already off to a disappointing start?

The old adage states a journey of a thousand miles begins with one step. So, what does that say about each one we take in this new year?

Some steps in the recovery journey are steps of progress. But what hits us with devastation are those other steps, right? Sometimes, in recovery, the step we’re taking feels like one of failure or relapse. We may even feel like the best we can hope for is to trudge and sink our footsteps into barren cold snow.  How are we to regard those kinds of steps? As hopeless? As final? As paralysis? No. they are just as much a part of progress as any victory, “good day,” or “good step.”

Motivational speaker, John Maxwell, wrote a book on a wonderful concept to consider, especially in moments of failure and relapse: “Failing Forward.”

Think about that.

In life, unfortunately, we often will fail. Recovery is not immune from that failure reality either. But there is hope; with each failure; whether you feel it or not, you and I are moving forward, making progress. One of my favorite scriptures, encouraging me through many dark, trying steps, has been that of 2 Corinthians 3:18:

“And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.”

Recovery means going from step to step, glory to glory and even, sometimes failure to failure. But please know that Elohim’s in control of our every step, regardless of our feelings about where we’re going. We are moving forward; He is too wonderful to allow us to be left.

“I will never leave you nor forsake you.”

Hebrews 13:5

It may be at a snail’s pace, this progress we’re seeking. But that snail; gets a bad rap. A hugely inspiring quote is from the 19th century English preacher, Charles H. Spurgeon:

“By perseverance the snail reached the ark.”

We need to keep that slow movement in mind. Slow movement does not mean no movement. And the end result for the snail was the goal, the ark. Did the snail have obstacles, rough terrain and dangers along the way? Probably. Did that stop the snail? No. The snail moved slowly, in small increments. As do we.

“For who has despised the day of small things? for they shall rejoice..”.

Zechariah 4:10

Yes, progress seems slow, if it can be even seen at all. You don’t see any positive results from all of your efforts, tears and pain. You feel like you’re going nowhere, nowhere good, anyhow.

But there is meaning in this tiny, gradual step each of us may be taking, whether it be in life, in recovery- or in both, at the same time.

Taking these tiny steps, one by one, does have a cumulative effect. It builds upon our future and individual destinies. And yes, that applies to the new year, resolution or no resolution.

We need to remember that our loving Father sees us as His children. Because of that perspective, He’s always helping and preparing us. It doesn’t matter if/when we fail or fall. He’s still our loving Father, who desires to bless His children. In fact, scripture tells us…

“So if you who are evil know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good things to those who keep on asking him!”

Matthew 7:11

So, take that next step. Remember Jeremiah 29:11. It includes- it never excludes- you!

“For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

It’s all in how we look at it. How then, are we choosing to look at our recovery processes and our lives? Do we see beauty, value and potential? Or do we see ugliness, worthlessness, failure and a pointless existence? We can choose.

“I call heaven and earth to record this day against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing: therefore choose life, that both thou and thy seed may live.”

Deuteronomy 30:19

The fact is, just because we feel a certain way, doesn’t mean that’s truly the way it is.

“When I was a child, I spake as a child,I understood as a child, I thought as a child:
but when I became a man, I put awaychildish things. For now we see through a
glass, darkly; but then face to face: nowI know in part; but then shall I know even
as also I am known.”

1 Corinthians 13:11

We may feel hopeless or like a failure. But those are feelings. The Most High’s Word, instead, is the Truth!

“Since you were precious in my sight… I have loved you…”

Isaiah 43:4

“I have chosen you and have not cast you away.”

Isaiah 41:9

“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.”

Jeremiah 29:11

Let’s see ourselves differently. We may feel we are one way, but why limit ourselves to that, especially if it’s harmful? Our Creator has more for each one of us than just our present situation, perception and condition.

We’re in a brand new year right now. What kind of step are you taking today in this new start? Whatever it may be, please realize that it is one which is lovingly guided by our Father. Having a great step today? Wonderful! Having a struggling step or a “failure” step today? Please recognize that He’s allowing it to move you to another place of victory, recovery, success and help. You will get there; you ARE getting there. Remember your journey, not just today’s step. There’s more to your life than you realize!

Happy New Year! Have a wonderful, healthy, grace-filled journey this next year and beyond, step by step.

Copyright © 2018 by Sheryle Cruse


Rewire Your Brain


Instead of "Stop Crying"


Think Like an Artist


The Best Revenge


The Naggin Question...


Short People Challenge...


Reaching Perfection?




“Thou shalt be perfect with the LORD thy God.”

Deuteronomy 18:13

The artist, Salvador Dali is famous for stating one of my favorite quotes:

"Have no fear of perfection. You'll never reach it."

Indeed, if you look at his art, there was a challenging of the perfect, of the “normal,” of the expected. Surreal images were not about depicting something as it occurred in life. Stretched out clocks and manipulated human bodies captured that artistic representation.

If one cannot find his depiction of perfection in his work, the same, however, cannot be said about the existence of excellence there. It is pervasive. Imagination, bravery and human imperfections are all there. And, I believe, that’s part of why we identify so strongly with his art. We can relate to him; we can relate to the images we see.

It’s just a shift in thinking.

And that leads me to the perfection issue itself. It really is a defeating word, isn’t it? “Perfect.”

What if we changed our perspective on it? What if we chose to embrace the messy, constant and imperfect process as excellence?

What if being imperfect didn’t cancel out our excellence and value? What if being imperfect, in fact, made us much more interesting?

Indeed, if we look at the process of process instead of a finished end product, there certainly is a more fascinating story going on.

“The law of the LORD is perfect, converting the soul: the testimony of the LORD is sure, making wise the simple.”

Psalms 19:7

God never told us we wouldn’t go through a process. And that definitely covers our focus on Him. Just because God’s in it, doesn’t mean it’s painless or easy.

“And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.”

2 Corinthians 12:9

And, it’s often in this messy, imperfect and painful journey that we find out who we are; we can discover meaningful purpose.

“Not as though I had already attained, either were already perfect: but I follow after, if that I may apprehend that for which also I am apprehended of Christ Jesus.”

Philippians 3:12

Having a perfect, unchallenged life, however, would rarely afford us this same result.

Honestly, I like the sound of the word, “excellent.” There’s more to it, in my opinion; it’s more interesting.

It’s a challenge to us all, then, to have no fear of perfection. Being who were are is so much better.

Copyright © 2018 by Sheryle Cruse


























































Discovering the Ever Changing Image…




 “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.” That’s how the saying goes. But what if that eye keeps changing?

As someone who’s in recovery from disordered eating and image issues, I’m inundated with the physical image factor. In my childhood, like many other females, I wholeheartedly believed beauty looked a certain way…and that estimation was an unchanging, certain gospel. And, of course, the lion’s share of that gospel message was a thin aesthetic. That’s part of what contributed to my dicey experiences with anorexia, bulimia, binge eating and diabolical self-loathing.

Over ten years ago, I just scratched the surface of these issues when my book, “Thin Enough: My Spiritual Journey Through the Living Death of an Eating Disorder” was published. Now, however, I’m not only navigating through my dysfunctional body image potpourri, but I’m also encountering females, younger and younger, plagued by it as well. Perhaps, once upon a time, only teenagers and young adults were predominantly vulnerable to eating disorders. However, now, it affects children who are afraid to “get fat.”

Still, an insidious issue impacting the female gender is specifically linked to beauty. Think about it. From the time we hear our first fairytale or see an animated depiction of it, princesses, heroines and good fairies are beautiful. And part of that beauty involves their slim bodies. “No fat girls allowed” appears to be the message indoctrinated, early on, into the female gender’s value system. For all of the supposed strides we’ve made with body acceptance, diversity and beauty definitions, come on, let’s get real; the thin standard is still the look we flock to the most. It’s a default beauty setting.

But it has not always been this way. Part of the recovery work I do is exploring and discussing the ever changing beauty image.  Most of the time, young girls come to me fully convinced only an emaciated image is attractive. Since they are not that image naturally, they often develop eating disorder behaviors to achieve that look. And, of course, they reject themselves during the entire process. Often, unfortunately, these females are unaware of and immune to the reality of changing image.

Discovering this reality of the ever changing beauty aesthetic can, indeed, be liberating. There have been varied definitions existing throughout time. And the meaning they possess reaches beyond the actual image itself. It’s about representation and dangled promises. Therefore, awareness of these beauty trends and their representations may be a key to more accepting self-perceptions. The application of knowledge IS power- and toward a healthier and happier life to boot.

So, let’s take a stroll down beauty history lane and see what images were heralded as the “must have” look.

We begin with the 17th century artist, Sir Peter Paul Rubens. He was obsessed with the voluptuous female figure in his work, including his ode to the spectacular derriere, “The Three Graces (1635). This was long before Jennifer Lopez. “Rubenesque” women possessed rounded backsides, breasts and abdomens, all representing prosperity. Their bodies looked like that because they could afford to eat well. And hey, wealth has always been attractive, right?

And, speaking of wealth, what about 19th century’s corset trend? The tiny waist was in demand as it exemplified well-bred beauty, again, associated with the rich crowd.

 So, “Tight Lacers” were born. A little ditty from the time period…

“In my hourglass corset I’m laced every day. My little wasp waist is shrinking away. The stays squeeze me inwards so small and so nice, in a pattern of lacing that grips like a vice.”

Yes, women often fainted while pursuing this beauty trend. And this was just one of the various health complications experienced while striving to be a tight lacer. Some women suffered serious harm to their internal organs as whalebone corsets actually reshaped their bodies to the rigid form of the undergarment.

Delightful.

Next, we enter the 1900’s, complete with its moving pictures. We have our first film star, Mary Pickford, “America’s Sweetheart.” With her head full of ringlets, she resembled a porcelain doll; there was no hint of sexuality- or womanly curves. Simple, uncomplicated and reassuringly girlish, Pickford embodied the easily controlled female. Her helpless beauty signaled to all she needed to be taken care of.

So, when the roaring twenties with its notorious flapper exploded, it was an unsettling game changer. Now, all traces of the virginal ingénue were gone. In her place, instead, was the rebellious, sexually free party girl. She smoked cigarettes and drank booze. Her hair was bobbed short and her small busted silhouette exposed a lot of leg in her short, fringe dresses. This look was a declaration of independence.

But we’re just getting warmed up.

With the 1930’s in full swing, here comes screen siren Marlene Dietrich. Often dressed in tailored men’s suits, she took it a step further; she flirted with sexual identity. Both her style of dress and her body needed no one’s permission to look that way. Indeed, Hollywood was clueless what to do with her bisexuality. Everything is up for grabs.

Which is, perhaps, why 1940’s war time returned us to the conventional safety of the curvy female form. Betty Grable and Rita Hayworth were its notable pinups, decorating fighter planes. Dependable depictions of traditional beauty soothed us with Americana: Mom, God and apple pie. And, since there was the presence of Rosie the Riveter in the workplace, filling the gap left by men in the military, beauty, possibly needed to be a traditionally safe feminine image.

And so, curves continued their popularity in the postwar 1950’s, as American suburbia and family became the focus. Rosie the Riveter was required to be domestic again. Women were encouraged to be wives and mothers, while exemplifying the ultimate feminine demeanor. So, now we celebrate our best known sex symbol, Marilyn Monroe, as the ideal of womanhood.

And here’s a reality check, everyone; Marilyn was a size 14.

Still, it appears the curves of Betty, Rita and Marilyn had a limited shelf life as, with the 1960’s, change comes again. Now we have Audrey Hepburn from the 1961 film, “Breakfast at Tiffany’s” and First Lady, Jacqueline Kennedy. There seems to be a streamlining occurring, exalting the thin female appearance.

And this lays still more groundwork for the thin body type to solidify its presence as the 1960’s continue. Emerging from Great Britain’s Mod scene is the model, Twiggy. Named for her stick- like legs, she showcased short hair, painted on eyelashes and a gamine form. This was a radical departure from the curvy association with feminine beauty. But perhaps this trend’s message wasn’t strictly about fashion. Could it be that during this turbulent decade, with the Vietnam War, civil rights and a strong baby boomer presence, curves were now seen as antiquated and irrelevant?

Regardless, image trends continue to change.

Next, the 1970’s promoted the “natural girl;” this included models Lauren Hutton and Cheryl Tiegs. The standard emphasized health food, nature and less make up. Maybe, because of the disillusionment from the Vietnam War and Watergate, there was an emphasis on being real. The less artifice, the less smoke and mirrors, perhaps, the better.

Contrast that “less is more” trend with that of the excessive 1980’s; fashion, image and lifestyle are all larger than life. “Supermodels” Cindy Crawford and Naomi Campbell were two of its dominant icons, driving the frenzy to be “model thin.”

And the 1980’s fitness explosion certainly did nothing to discourage that sentiment. Jane Fonda’s aerobic workout tapes fed a lucrative diet and fitness industry which validated the decade’s doctrines:  “You can never be too rich or too thin,” “Feel the burn” and “No pain, no gain.”

So, once the 1990’s and Seattle’s music scene arrived, yet again, there seemed to be a gigantic shift. Grunge bands, Nirvana and Pearl Jam wore flannel shirts and were disinterested in glamour. Were we, therefore, moving into an era unaffected by physical appearance?

Not so fast. For now, we have “Heroin Chic.” This look embraced Grunge’s flannel on its fashion pages and runways, via its emaciated muse, Kate Moss. Designers like Calvin Klein courted controversy for their use of Moss and similar waif-looking models. Ads were filled with provocative imagery which often suggested drug use and child pornography.

So, the beauty image continues to have a disturbing, ever changing, go of things.

And yes, those changes continue into the Millennium. With the information age, surely, now, we can embrace a healthy and accurate view of image?

Right? Right?

Perhaps. Yes, there has been some body type diversification in this new century. Celebrities like Jennifer Lopez, Kate Winslet and Beyonce are famous for their prominent derrieres. Yet, despite their “fuller figures,” there is still the emphasis on svelte and toned frames.

And this preoccupation ushered in yet another troubling trend post-2000: the “Scary Skinny” movement. Its goal was “Size 0,” and, in some extremes, “negative sizes.”

Celebrities who experienced extreme weight loss, like former Spice Girl/style icon, Victoria Beckham, actress, Lindsey Lohan and pop star, Lady Gaga have all been held in question. Were they extremely thin because of healthy lifestyle choices or were they, in fact, suffering from anorexia, bulimia and/or substance abuse? Speculation circulated.

But the severity of their appearances could not be denied: frail looking frames, prominently jutting shoulder blades and the now disturbingly coveted “thigh gaps.”

Ah, yes, here we go…thigh gaps…

With prominently hollowed spaces between the legs, this trend currently occupies many “thinsperation,” or “thinspo,” pro-eating disorder websites. It is now a desired “beauty” image.

And, who knows what the next big beauty trend may be? It is coming, just as surely as any of these other looks have arrived.

Image is cyclical. What is old is new again. “Retro” looks litter fashion lines. There’s a hint of the 1940’s here, the 1960’s there. And so on and so on…

All things are subject to change. That’s important to remember in any life issue. But the changing image factor is certainly a fickle beast. And, yes, that beast changes its body image with the fashion du jour.

Regardless, we need to be consistent with ourselves, to accept ourselves, as ourselves.

Indeed, what remains a constant is how spectacular we already are.

Therefore, in all of your discovery about the ever changing image, please discover that truth for yourself!

Copyright © 2018 by Sheryle Cruse